Friday, September 04, 2020

The Outpatient

I had a hospital outpatient appointment yesterday. It was my third for the same matter and I refused further treatment and the specialist agreed.

My first visit had me armed with a map and a drawn path. In spite of that in the rabbit warren of the Alfred Hospital, I became lost but not too badly and I eventually found the place to be and was on time. 

I was so confident for my second visit I did not bother with the map and I became totally lost. The hospital volunteer could not steer me in the right direction and nor could staff, mainly because I had the name of where I had to attend wrong. I was in a panic that I would be late, but I wasn't. However the ever so hot specialist Doctor Jordan was.

Surely this time I will get it right, my third visit. I rehearsed in my head that I need to catch the central lift to the fourth floor, turn right and then right again down a long walkway, right again for a short distance and then left. 

As I entered I was temperature checked and asked 20 questions. No, I have not been overseas on holidays bitch face. Yes, my mask is fresh on this morning. I was allowed to pass go.

Next stage another person to check where I was going. Your papers, Sir. Sorry, no papers, just a confirmation text message on my phone. He did not glance at the text message but actually read it, and then slapped on my arm a bright orange visitor sticker.

Up in the lift I went and another person at a temporary desk challenged me, and just as well. You can't walk down this way I'm afraid, even if you have before. This is now a COVID ward. Go back to the ground floor, find the eastern lifts, and then go up to the fourth floor. If you get lost or confused, do ask. All of the staff were so nice and pleasant and quite used to dealing with lost idiots. I found my way easily enough eventually. 

I met up with R two thirds through Fawkner Park on my way home for some food and coffee. The weather had warmed and under my mask I was dripping sweat. It was such a relief to take it off to eat and drink.

R drank his coffee and about halfway through mine, I said, what on earth am I drinking? R had drunk my black coffee, wondering why his coffee tasted a little bitter and I had been drinking his flat white which I realised tasted very milky. 

We really know how to live!

28 comments:

  1. It sounds to me as if both of you were more than a little stressed.
    Refusing further treatment? I hope that you are ok?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was stressed EC. No reason for R to be stressed. It was for treatment I emailed you about in the past.

      Delete
  2. After an unplanned tour of the hospital like that one I'd been in a state of high anxiety, that is for sure, and plonked into a hospital bed because of heart palpitations! :)

    Take good care. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lee, I cope with such things. My life seems full enough of them.

      Delete
  3. Things have been just as complicated for me here. Not sure if I am coming or going these days.
    Will write you privately.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maribeth, and you did. Much love and support.

      Delete
  4. Why the "bitch face"? The girl is just doing her job and is probably fed up with having to ask the questions over and over just as you are with answering. I know you didn't say it out loud, but still, karma got you with the coffee mix up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. River, yes I know and of course I am always perfectly polite. But the idea that we could have been on an overseas holiday just seemed so preposterous. Whether it was a male or female it is irrelevant.

      Delete
  5. Were you both drinking from takeaway cups with the lid on?

    Otherwise, what EC said.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MC, yes and we try to sit away from where the public walks, in case they spill germs.

      Delete
  6. Gee to enter our hospital there two simple question. In last 30 days have you been out of county. And the other question is have been in contact with anyone that had covid or been test for it. Last thing they take your temperature.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dora, yes, those questions were asked too.

      Delete
  7. One of the reason I don't drink coffee when out is those cups, I prefer China or glass, not plastic glass either - that's me.
    Doesn't taste so good when you drink the wrong coffee..
    Hospitals are hard to find your way around especially if the right way has a covid ward since last visit - very frustrating for you, but you got there in the end.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Margaret, how we would love to sit down at a table and drink coffee from china cups, but we can't and have to settle for second best. Newer hospitals are less confusing but can still be a bit hard.

      Delete
  8. I don't know who I feel sorrier for.. the residents of hospitals, old age homes etc or the nurses and other staff who risk their lives fulfilling their professional responsibilities. Be well, my friend!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Hels. Outbreak among health care workers at St V's Private now. Nevertheless, the staff at The Alfred were all bright and cheerful and did not seem fearful.

      Delete
  9. It’s a hard time for us all not made any ‘better’ by unexpected hiccups. I hope the two of you had a little laugh over your cup mixup and didn’t snap at each other.
    Not sure how we’re going to get on once the weather warms up - have little hot air exhausts coming out the top of our masks like those on big trucks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cathy, no snapping. Just laughed at our stupidity. We've just ordered reusable masks in the hope that they are cooler. Already I have been sweating under the surgical masks.

      Delete
  10. Finding the office, you passed the test for mental capacity.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Big hospitals are so confusing, I've got to know both the hospital not too far from me because of the number of times I took and visited my mum before she passed and the big hospital in the city because of the number of times I've taken both sisters and visited them. P and I drink same coffee except I have mine extra hot, can't stand lukewarm coffee 😁😁 Hope you guys are coping alright over there 💜

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Grace, R's is now an extra hot flat white. At times they make mine extra hot too, and it takes me forever to drink it.

      Delete
  12. Well, I hope you're OK! Dealing with big hospitals is always kind of stressful. They're such warrens -- often built up gradually by consecutive additions that over time make no cohesive sense.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Steve, it is very much that case at The Royal Prince Alfred.

      Delete
  13. Hilarious! I hope I don't get like you in my old age.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Gigi. You don't want to be like me.

      Delete
  14. Complex office complexes where every hall and door look the same. Nice horror movie setting maybe.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Strayer, the consolation being there would be lots of places to hide.

      Delete

Democracy is all very well, but why give it to the people? - Audrey Forbes-Hamilton.