Saturday, December 28, 2019

What a swell party it was

I don't normally do this and sorry to you who have read this before, but R was transferring birthdays from this year's calendar to next year's, next year's being a Lego themed one from the daughter of blogger https://www.ourfarm-ily.com/ Of course it never rains but pours. Mother gave us a Guide Dogs calendar for Christmas. It is nice and does have the helpful school holidays marked, but we decided to use the calendar we bought. Labradors all look so similar. But we will have to remember to put it up if she visits.

I decided as R transferred the birthdays I would make a list. It is so easy to miss a birthday, especially if they are at the beginning of the month and you don't see them until you turn over the month. Then I decided to add years of birth for those who we know or have noted down so we can check before we buy a birthday card if the person is having a significant birthday. There are none this year. Damn, Brighton Antique Dealer's year of birth is not noted. I did find it in my blog as we were at her 80th birthday party and I searched my blog with the name of the venue, Masque. After the party I wrote this. I really quite like what I wrote. Some of you will remember bits of it but newer readers won't have read it.

Dear Dame M,

Gosh, it is seven years since you died. How times flies. I think of you often and what your friendship meant to so many people and especially us. You'll be pleased to know your little gang still all catch up with each other every so often. Let me think, you were 82 when you died, so you would now be 89. I think you may have become crabby by the time you reached that age, so maybe just as well you went a bit early. You were already quite imperious you know. There has been an English show on tv called Downton Abbey. You would have enjoyed it and done as well in the role of The Dowager Countess of Grantham, played by Maggie Smith.

Anyway, through you we came to know our friend Brighton Antique Dealer. Can you believe she has turned 80. We had a great celebration on Friday night for her birthday at a place called Masque, just walking distance from us in Park Street. BAD has not changed much but she now lives a medium rise retirement enclave not far up the same street as her shop house, which she sold. Haha, I remember how regal you looked as you descended her stairs on her electric stair chair. You should have had a ciggie in one hand and a martini in the other.

Do you remember BAD's daughter, the dyke, daughter of her first Arab husband? Btw, he died a year or so ago in Daylesford. BAD was surprisingly distressed. Remember what BAD said when she first saw her first husband undressed? She thought my god, that monster is not going to fit anywhere. She has a son, but by a different father, and the son was living with his what I guess is kind of his step father. He sounds like a bit of a loser. Ah yes, the daughter. Well, she organised the event and she did a great job. It was an open bar and I suppose there were over fifty people there and plenty of finger food too. It must have cost a bomb. Gee, I doubt I would have fifty people at my funeral, let alone rustle up fifty people for a party when I am eighty.

Your boarder of thirty years attended of course, in the guise of Jasmine. Naturally Jazzie had to do a couple of numbers. She is quite amateurish, but she looked great and the straights loved her. I took photos. Speaking of which, I had to check when you died and I had forgotten I put a few photos of you on my blog. Take a look here. Commenters on the post back there are no longer readers of my blog. Such is the way of the world Dame M, but you are the last person who ever needed educating about ways of the world.

At your funeral your Boarder made a speech, a very long one, as he pranced back and forth across the stage in full flight and eventually the metaphorical crook with a hook came out, and he was hauled off. His speech at BAD's birthday party was equally torturous, but mercifully short. BAD's daughter made a brief speech with her mother at her side and BAD became quite emo. BAD has endured some personal hardship since you departed, but of course, what hardship is there really when you have money. Insurance paid for her flooded shop house, health insurance paid for top care for her broken bones when she fell.

Never a problem for you Dame M, who arrived at parties late, held court and then departed before things became messy, but I find parties so hard and try to avoid them. But BAD's party was really great. We even danced. Remember our black friend and your boarder's hairdresser friend? They both had a bit to drink and the more they had the more uninhibited their dancing became. Oh, but here is a downer you might not know, the hairdresser had cancer and a double mastectomy. She disconnected from us all from diagnosis to full recovery. Just her way of dealing with it.

Did you know your house has been divided up into rather nice flats? The upstairs flats are still there but your house and the downstairs flat have been turned into about five flats. I peered through windows before they were sold and there are still bits of your house there such as the lounge room mantle piece and the arch from the dining room to the lounge room. Great that your house wasn't demolished.

Anyway darls,
missing you heaps,
Andrew.





41 comments:

  1. Oh Andrew.
    I went back and read the last post, and then came back and reread this one.
    Yet another post which shows what a lovely friend you are.
    Dame M looks gorgeous by the way. Vital, imperious, and fun.

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    1. EC, she was certainly fun but her slow death at home was horrible.

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  2. I am sure she would be delighted by your post. Although gone she certainly hasn't been forgotten.
    PS The balloons were definitely worth a look. Thanks for the info.

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    1. Marie, I guess we will see the balloons in due course.

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  3. Anyone would be crabby at 89.

    This post is filled with so much love it brought tears to my eyes, as did the last post. You really are quite a lovely man, and friend.

    A friend like that stays with you, even when they're gone... and sometimes you find echoes of them in others.

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    1. Very nicely put Jac. As you can guess, she had a very interesting life.

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  4. Andrew, fantstic post and memories of your friend. RIP

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  5. What a lovely tribute, I hope someone thinks enough of me to write a post like this.

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    1. Jackie, maybe that will happen for you. I am sure it won't for me.

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  6. What a lovely thing to share with your readers.btganj you Andrew.

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    1. Carol, as a teacher and mother of a teen, you are so in touch with young people. I need a translation for btganj

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  7. .Your a special freind

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  8. Ah, what a tribute, and the boarder sounds like something else. Made me have a moment, to think we all die in the end, there's no way around it. We all get old and shriveled and abandoned and then dead. Gosh, depressing myself. But then there are the lovely tributes like this one to a friend, put on blogs, and Dame M lives on, in some ways.

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    1. Strayer, The Boarder can be a real pain at times but he essentially a nice person. He loved Dame M deeply and misses her horribly.

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    2. "can be a pain"? Are you being tricky, Andrew? Surely "could be"? - I'm only relying here on your own post: https://highriser.blogspot.com/2016/01/funeral.html

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    3. Marcellous, this reposted piece was written when The Boarder was still alive, in 2015, if that is what you mean.

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    4. So the comment written by Strayer was when he was still alive. I am not sure that reposting things like this is a good idea. It becomes confusing.

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    5. You are right. It is confusing if you repost with the comments. I certainly missed that the entire post and comments were a repeat. I thought you must be muddying or covering your tracks, possibly for privacy reasons, which seemed a bit odd given that you presumably thought you'd done that sufficiently in the first place.

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    6. My most humble....

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  9. You throw the party and Miss O'Dyne and I will be there, however saggy, daggy or droopy we may be. Make sure the Champagne is classy.

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    1. Jah Teh, s'pose you would want that expensive French muck, but I only run to Asti Spumante. Anyway, I plan to be away for any future significant birthdays.

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  10. I don't have a clue what most of this is about, someone who died and someone else having a birthday, you went to the party and danced. I must have missed a post or two somewhere in the past. Good to hear the party was fun anyway.

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    1. River, yes probably just before we became blog friends. Yep, it was a good party.

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  11. I have no idea either who she is or was, but your post is a nice tribute to her ! I hope their is internet in heaven or hell (it depends how she was) and she can read your post !

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    1. Gattina, wherever she is, I think she is reading this.

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  12. A tribute to a dear friend who obviously meant a great deal to you...a birthday party for another...well put together Andrew..

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  13. What a very lovely tribute to Dame M Andrew, she must have been a really special lady to warrant so much affection.. Had a look back at her photos, she did look rather elegant.

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    1. Grace, rarely was she ever not well turned out. Her business was fashion and clothes.

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  14. aaah, memories x

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    1. Fen, their is a lot to be said for wallowing in memories when you are older.

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  15. A lovely letter with some very nice memories in it.

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    1. Thanks River. It is nice to remember.

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  16. Nice tribute. Makes me think of letters I should write

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    1. Travel, my sister wrote a letter to our step father shortly before he died. My mother said it was the only time she had ever seen him cry. We should write those letters.

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  17. Going through some papers etc., the other day, I came across some cherished memories...written cherished memories....Sad and happy reflections...

    Lovely, Andrew...keep it in a safe place, or perhaps have it framed.

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    1. That's nice Lee. Sad and happy, yes. The letter is only online. Maybe I should print it out.

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Democracy is all very well, but why give it to the people? - Audrey Forbes-Hamilton.