Saturday, September 21, 2013

We needed beef

I am no longer moight, mate, as I was in far eastern Victoria but darls in southern New South Wales. I am not sure if it is NSW wide, but staff in southern NSW are very friendly and quite familiar, maybe a little too so, darls.

Foreigner, I kept pointing out to R, until he corrected me that our car number plate indicated we were foreigners in a strange land. I restrained myself from yelling at the tv when sports news came on and it was mostly about rugby, "We don't care". Their state, their sports, I suppose.

New South Wales is somewhat different to my home state of Victoria. They paint funny little arrows on the road in two rows and I have no idea what they mean.

Last night we dined at a Thai restaurant and they did not have wine for sale. I was dispatched to the local bottle shop to buy a bottle of wine. The food was good and the service excellent. One  lass served the whole restaurant amazingly well. It would not happen at home.

Tonight we both had a hungering for steak. Surely the local Returned Servicemens League Club will serve a good steak.

We each put $5 into the pokie machines. I lost mine. R broke even. We went for dinner and since we had arrived, a queue had formed. We were given a beeper to alert us when our table would be ready. I steered into the direction of lounge chairs but R steered me back to to pokie machines. R nudged me, that woman in a track suit who stood beside you for five seconds shoved a $50 note into the machine. I looked  across at the machine and she had left credits on it, three cents to be precise. Between us, we turned her three cents into twenty dollars, took the money and ran. Later when we were out in the beer garden and catching a breath of fresh air, there were pokie machines out there too and the same track suit woman was there shoving more $50 notes into a machine. 

I thought the lad had made a mistake when he charged me $6.10 for my glass of wine of R's low alcohol beer. These two drinks would cost between $9 plus anywhere in Melbourne. NSW clubs used to subsidise meals from poker machine profits. Now they seem to subsidise drinks. The food was full price. How odd to put a delicious steak on a bed of mashed potato. How odd for your steak and salad to come with both mashed potato and chips. One version of spud is what we normally have at home.

"R, why are we road tripping when it is school holidays in Victoria and New South Wales?" Neither of us can recall the reason for the chosen dates, but there must have been one. We are in the company of many children.

I nudged R at dinner, Sisters sitting nearby. Indeed two older gay guys were there, but they were unidentifiable as gay unless you knew to look at where they were looking, kind of like of R and myself.

Friday, September 20, 2013

Man hunting and other stuff on the NSW South Coast

I think I may be hormonal. We dined in a Thai restaurant this evening on the south coast of New South Wales and I kept scouring the restaurant for a hot guy. It was slim pickings.

There were a lot of older people there. They are interesting to observe. They are old and have old people's ways. You know, between fifty and sixty five, and some a bit older even. Um, that is us and we are with these older people. How the fuck did that happen? How was I sitting there dispassionately and objectively observing older people when I am one of them?

"R, there is a lad facing the wall. Have you observed him?"


"He has great hair. What does he look like?"

He had quite long curly slightly bleached surfer hair.

"I can't see his face."

"So is his companion attractive? Does she look hot."

"Not really."

"Oh! Tell me when he gets up to leave."

"He is standing right behind you and waiting to pay."

Omg, while he would not be described as skinny, he had knockout looks. When R predeceases me, I will hunt him out and stalk him. As I said, I must be hormonal. I hope it isn't the change. Is it true everyone has their price? If I pay him enough, will he love me long time?

Meanwhile back at our accommodation we are watching Miss Phryne Fisher solve a crime in Queenscliff, near where Sister lives on the Bellarine. I was going to send Sister a text message to alert her but then I recalled she is staying at the Highrise and seeing a football match tonight.

I sent her a text yesterday to tell her to bring her own teabags as we are down to one bag left in the canister and that there is a bag of vegetables in the crisper for her to take home that were going to give to our friend in Lakes Entrance. The bag of vegetables that we forgot will be added to a post of what we forgot to take on holidays. The list is long.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Who stole my 4G?

Lakes Entrance, 2 nights, tick. With a Telstra tower almost looming over us, good 4G.

Swan Reach, Bruthen, Buchan Caves and Orbost today, tick.

Mallacoota this evening, tick.  No 4G and 3G not crash hot either.

The local supermarket checkout chick called me mate. I drew myself up to my full height and put on my poshest voice, and she called me mate again. Have it your way then moight.

A man in a car waved to me. Then another and another. I didn't know them. How hot am I!

Settling down to an evening of watching commercial tv ads for sheep dip and corrugated iron water tanks.

With trepidation I will click publish and see what happens.

The countryside, bless.

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Ciao mon amis

We are setting off for a road trip, east, north west, north, and south. Internet access may be possible, accommodation wifi and the big phone company dependant, but don't expect me to a reliable internet person for a week or so.


Monday, September 16, 2013

The royal home movies

I thought I had seen it all before but there was forthcoming King Charles introducing and commenting on family home movies. No, it was new to me.I had not seen it before.

As the tv show concluded with God Save the Queen, I felt compelled to stand and I did. English born R remained seated.

Wow, after so many years, I still feel a compulsion to stand for God save our Gracious Queen. It is an automatic response.

If your are a long time reader of my blog, you will know that I am very anti religious hokey pokey nonsense, but I do understand where it comes from if your religion came from your childhood and was ingrained into you.

My understanding of ingrained religion comes from me always standing for Australia's national anthem, which was when I was child and a youf, God Save the Queen. I don't feel compelled to stand for our present national anthem. If others do, I will, but I certainly don't at home.

My Bar Maid Friend Part 2

We arrived at Ollie's sister's place in Gympie. Ollie had never told me she was from a Salvation Army family and her sister was a practiser.  I slept in  a closed in verandah, hot and sweaty. The water was heated by a stove for a bath, no shower, but no sooner than I got out out of the bath, I was hot and sweaty again. This is humidity then. I was not liking.

There was an outside lav and you had to bat the cane toads out of the way to get along the path at night. To put it frankly, the house was a dump and Gympie a pretty ugly town with ugly people. I hated both. There were no window furnishings on the row of louvre windows where I slept and when the sun rose, it shone straight on to me, putting me in a foul temper to begin the day.

There were kids in the house, I assume Ollie's nieces and nephews. I can't remember the father, but I think there was one.

I spent most of time trapping flies. Mother would never have sticky fly paper in our home. Instead she drowned flying critters with a some fast pumping on the DDT dispersal pump. This is fly paper.

Maybe it is a defective memory but sprayed flies back then used to die instantly. They don't now. Bring back the DDT, I say.

But the favoured device for caching flies in Queensland was this thing. How delightful was one's morning cereal when looking at floating dead flies. A slightly sugary syrup was added to bowl and the flies were attracted to it and flew in and could not fly out again and drowned. My anti animal cruelty does not extend to flies. But it was also a device to put over the top of flies, and that was how I amused myself. Flies would land and I would put this device over the top of them and trap them. I prefer 2013 where in such situations I can play with a very different device at the breakfast table.

Nevertheless, it was interesting to visit Tin Can Bay where I don't recall there being anything more than a rustiy tin shed, Rainbow Beach, Noosa and Maryborough where another sister of Ollie's lived. I noticed a Wonderheat heater at the Maryborough sister's house. Translated to day, wtf? Why? (Diane and her OTH have informed that you do need winter heating in Queensland.) At some point we did the Sunshine Coast, north of Brisbane, which was much nicer than the Gold Coast.

At some ungodly hour in the morning I was back in Brisbane and Ollie walked me past some half drunk and hungover aborigines in South Brisbane to the bus depot, whereby I caught a coach home, which took a couple of days and at least one night, maybe two. My first visit to the toilet on the bus resulted in my system shutting down for the rest of the journey with no further need of the toilet. The stench from the toilet was unbelievable and permeated the coach. It must have been a very cheap ticket. I suppose the coach stopped along the way for us to buy food.

Queensland and Victoria had different times because of daylight saving, but it was the weekend daylight saving ended or began, ended I guess. I became thoroughly confused as I adjusted my watch back and forth and I did not have a clue what time is was. I was so relieved to arrive back in Melbourne. I suppose I caught the train from town to Oakleigh and then a cab to Grandmother's. I expect my grandmother had to pay the cab fare. Ollie was an honest woman and did repay her share of what we borrowed from my grandmother. I resolved there and there to never have another holiday on the cheap and without adequate funds.

A mutual female friend of an age between Ollie and myself, with whom I had once had a pash and did not enjoy it at all, gave me feedback that Ollie said to her I did nothing but whinge. Partly true, I did complain about the weather but not to Ollie about the holiday itself or her weird and slightly spaced out sister who lived in a hovel.

Absolutely broke, I returned to work, only to find my shifts had been covered because there was a mistake about when I was returning.

Ollie returned from Queensland and our 'relationship' resumed until I left the hotel. I did see her briefly a couple of years later on a tram and it was very much a 'we must catch up' conversation.

Funny, I have always liked older women. Now most of the ones I like are my age or only a little older. You could say I still like older women, but I have caught up with them.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

A vist from Little Jo

Little Jo's grandmother, aka Mother, had curly blonde hair when she was three. It went dark.

Little Jo's mother, aka Sister, had curly blonde hair when she was three. It went dark.

Little Jo's had curly blonde hair when she was three. At the age of six, it has gone dark.

The trio from The Bellarine arrived last night and while they went off to the football, we minded Little Jo. We won't be around next week so they will stay here again in our absence whenever the next major football match happens. Bone Doctor's father is an Melbourne Cricket Club member and apparently Bone Doctor received a ticket in a ballot. How posh!

After a leisurely breakfast of cereal and crumpets, Sister and Bone Doctor went off to their flat in Murrumbeena that is between tenants at the moment. They have had it painted and were to check out carpet. They have been given a per metre price by someone local to them on The Bellarine, went to Carpet Call (where we bought our new carpet mid year), who said he could meet them next weekend and measure up and quote. They went on to Carpet Court or something like that, quite nearby and the chap realised there was an easy sale. I think the place was previously known as Maceys. We have bought carpet from there in the past. He said he could measure up today and did and gave them a price that was ok, so the carpet will be fitted next week; the layers will collect the key for the flat from the renting agent.

Bone Doctor had to do some doctor monitoring of a sporting event in Port Melbourne in the afternoon, so Sister occupied her time by exploring Port Melbourne on foot.

We were left with Little Jo. We took her to see her nanny, Mother. Mother had not seen her for ages, pre Sister's surgery. Little Jo rarely goes to McDonalds, but she knows she can push her Nanny's buttons by suggesting it as a place for lunch, and so that is where we lunched. It was very busy, but there is an older woman who has worked there for well over ten years and she organises people in queues, and separates people who want to order from those staring at the menu form those waiting for their order to be filled. Employers, do you business a favour by employing older workers.

Mother had wrecked her lounge room blind and a couple of people had tried to fix it. Her friend said, don't worry, Andrew and R will fix it, and we did. I cannot imagine how Mother managed to wreck it as the mechanism is quite well designed.

Little Jo watered some of her Nanny's plants, hosed R, hosed off his car and picked some flowers in Nanny's garden and put them into a basket and took them inside and arranged them without help and she didn't do a bad job. It was a quite pretty little vase of flowers.

"What have you been learning at school, Little Jo?"

"Compound words, Auntie Andrew".

What on earth are compound words, I thought to myself and then asked.

"They are where two words are joined to make up one word, like mailbox and..." She recited several and I have now forgotten what they were.

"Like cardboard, Little Jo?"


On the way to from Mother's, we played eye spy and sang some songs. I got through There's a Hole in the Bucket Dear Liza and I remembered most of Gilligan's Island theme tune. Between the three of us, we got through Puff, the Magic Dragon and Morning Town Ride. At one point Little Jo sang the alphabet and I exploded in anger when she got to h and pronounced it haitch. What has Sister been doing to let that happen? Once I hit publish here, I am going to send Sister a very terse text message to advise her to correct her child's error.

I won't even mention the argument R and had over the pronunciation of kilometre by the sat nav device. His argument of common usage possibly won over mine of, Gough told me. 

After returning home, Little Jo sat at the desktop computer doing something for kids at our ABC. I sat with the laptop and R sat with tablet. Sister returned at 4.30 and collected Little Jo, then went to pick up Bone Doctor and head off to Geelong to a friend's place for roast lamb. Little Jo was hungry before she left so R made us all a cheese and tomato sandwich. Consequently, I wasn't hungry at evening meal time and we had baked beans on toast.

What fun.