Monday, July 15, 2013

Open wide dearie

Bone Doctor gave us a dvd of photos she took as Sister gave birth to Little Jo. Oldest Niece has seen the photos. She said, I am not sure I wanted to see Auntie M giving birth and her so wide open. We have never looked at the dvd. It is way to much information for me.

In days of old woman never let their husbands see them naked. I suppose that was part of the feminine mystique. All men knew was that there were breasts, which they liked and an opening where they could insert themselves. If the woman received pleasure from the brief encounter, then well and good, but I expect many did not.

Society has moved on but I wonder if it has moved too far? There simply can't be much feminine mystique remaining after a bloke watches his partner give birth, yet society seems to now compel men to be present and share the experience when their partner delivers. Do men really want to be there? Do woman really want them there?

Maybe I am old fashioned or just ignorant about male female relationships.

18 comments:

  1. I suspect a lot of men do want to be there and the women want them there too. My son-in-law was there for his children's births and I was there too for the first one. My daughter got a lot of comfort from having him there to rub her back etc, and both parents were able to immediately bond with both babies. Son-in-law was the first to hold baby girl and he was wearing a green t-shirt. Her favourite colour has always been green. It was lovely to watch them looking at each other while daughter got tidied up. Did you know that newborns will copy your facial expressions? SIL would open his mouth wide and new GD would do the same. And nose scrunching too.

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    1. River, they are youngish. What about when you gave birth? I didn't know about newborns copying.

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    2. First birth hubby went to the pub, each following birth he had the excuse of looking after the other kids. Which meant he left them with friends and went to the pub.

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    3. River, that is how I remember things happening back in those years.

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  2. I'm not sure it's a good idea, my hubby would have made smart comments or would have been so horrified we would have stopped at one but times change and you never know some couples find it comforting.
    Merle.............

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    1. Merle, times do change and obviously I haven't. You didn't really say whether you would have liked him there.

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  3. It wasn't the done thing in my day but my daughter would have been devastated if her hubby hadn't been there. I don't think you really notice the the body parts as much as being in awe at the sight of a new life appearing, one that you had made.

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    1. Not the done thing in your day Diane, but your daughter wanted her husband there. Why has it changed so much? Maybe it is not so bad to be there if you are looking south rather than north.

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  4. I'm with you Andrew. all TMI and would frighten children.
    I had 3 without their father even being in the building, and am appalled by all the damn birthing on TV, and pervy people browsing birth books in Readings. erk. Maybe because I still have not bonded with my parents. erk.

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    1. Ann, so I take it while he wasn't there, nor would you want him to be.

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  5. I like the idea of the husband being there (of course!!) but there is no way in hell he's getting the view to "down town". Not a chance.

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    1. M, I guess that is what I was really thinking. To be there is perhaps not so bad, but not looking from a certain direction.

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  6. So have you watched the dvd Andrew?

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    1. No River. It has sat here for nearly six years and I have not. I know it is very graphic. There are some things brothers don't need or want to see about their sister.

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  7. Don't watch them Andrew, tres 'horrible :) P was in with me but definitely up at the face and hand holding end, and even then he almost passed out haha!

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    1. Grace, I am concluding it is not such a bad thing so long as the partner is at the head end looking down.

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  8. I gather my father was at work when I was born and when he informed his co workers of my birth they looked at him in surprise and asked him what was he doing being at work. This was 1949 and I suspect the co workers were not thinking that my father should have been at the hospital but rather at the pub celebrating.

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    1. Victor, I don't know where my father was when any of us were born, but you can be sure he was not present at the birth.

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