Sunday, February 24, 2013

I am gay. Your point is?

There are a couple of commenters who pop up on my blog at times who clearly have an issue with me being a gay male. They seem to find some things that I write about of interest, yet they can't get past me being gay. Frankly, I do not understand why they bother reading what I write. I come as a complete package, gay, interested in life matters, buildings and architecture, public transport, cars, nature, tech stuffs, history, photography, people watching and a little bit of kultcha.

When I was a kid, my brother and myself carved roads into hard dirt for our Matchbox toys to travel along. We battered our Tonka toys into each others, denting my model Holden EJ wagon and his EH sedan. We shot frogs in the dam with our air rifle. I tried to shoot my brother with the air rifle, but that was a fail and I only shot a hole through a window. We climbed to the absolute tops of trees. I drove the farm tractor at a very young age, when it was not needed, along bush tracks day after day, exploring and always with a dog riding with me as my companion.

What a butch kid I was.

Yet I shall never forget the stony and embarrassed look on my mother's face when at the age of about six I said in front of her friends as I stood beside the fridge, "I am Peggy, and I am putting on my wedding dress". A modern parent might have immediately judged her son as being potentially gay. I don't know what my mother thought and I doubt I will ever ask her. Sorry Mother, for embarrassing you in front of your friends. I was showing off, but very inappropriately.

Mrs Woog's son is only a young kid, but I do see a potential gay. Thankfully Mrs Woog is a modern and accepting parent. Her son will be a well adjusted whether he is just effeminate, a stage he is passing through, straight, or gay.

Clearly the writing was on the wall when Shannon was a kid, but what understanding parents.

Myself, Mrs Woog's son and Shannon all exhibited some feminine behaviour when we were young. It is no surprise that I turned out to be gay, nor Shannon and I doubt Mrs Woog will be surprised if her son turns out to be be gay.

What does really surprise me is that there are a whole lot of gay blokes out there who were not like us, or only a little bit like us.

Out there in the world is a whole lot of different people. There are gay men who have never behaved in any sort of effeminate manner. There are truly straight guys who have no issue with gay guys or dykes because they are confident in their straightness. There are straight guys who just wonder. There are straight guys who do more than just wonder, and there seems to be rather a lot of them. While I don't know Shannon aside from his blog, I expect he found his sexuality at a young age, as did I. We could be described as confident gay men, but there is only one thing we are confident in, our sexuality.  Otherwise we are as frail as everyone else.

For the record, it was one time I showed interest in dresses, although I do recall giving Mother fashion advice at times. Generally  I liked doing more boy things, but I read a lot, and I am not sure that reading as a kid back then was such a boy thing. Who really cares. Your children need your love, more than anything else in the world. Pray to god that there are more Mrs Woogs around and not too many mothers around like Tess Corbett.

24 comments:

  1. There was time when I had some commenters who stumbled across my blog and were disgusted to discover I am a gay man. The funny thing was that they kept stumbling across my blog again and again. Funny that!

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    1. Victor, amusing. Rather like someone yelling stop and then complaining when you do.

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  2. When I was living in Europe I had a flatmate who was a conservative muslim. We both got along very well and I consider him a friend (and vice versa) but I know that my sexuality would always be an issue for him, especially when he said one day, "You are a great guy; pity you are a gay"

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    1. AdRad, I've heard exactly the same words. I take more offence at that than blatant homophobia.

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  3. When my son was quite young he loved to dress up and wear jewellery. So what? So did his sister. The only person who didn't like it was my mother who told me I shouldn't let him. When I asked why she had no answer. Childhood is all about exploring and investigating things for themselves. I'm really proud of the way both of my kids have developed as caring, thoughtful and loving adults.

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    1. Fun60, the more I think about it, I doubt there really is a big connection between boys dressing up and being gay. Well done you.

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  4. In my ideal world, all behaviours would be seen as "human", not as specifically "male" or "female". Sexually stereotyping of behaviours limits children's options and makes some children feel awful.

    So if a little boy loves dolls or a little girl is happiest climbing trees, it should not put parents on alert. Rather parents should celebrate their children's diversity.

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    1. Hels, I imagine there are still many parents who would discourage their children stepping outside defined roles. Fortunately expert and non expert opinion seems to be against limiting children is such a way.

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  5. Heaven forbid we don't have to take trolls to be representative of all heterosexuals. Thank heaven there are so many decent people out there.

    The Kat in the Hat's reaction was a bit of a surprise.

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    1. FC, sorry, I don't get the Kat in the Hat reference.

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  6. "I am Peggy and I am putting on my wedding dress"
    If my son had said that at age six I would have said "who are you marrying?" and "let me get the camera!" I have a photo of him aged about four wearing one of the girls dresses, a straw sunhat and a handbag slung across his shoulders. It was all just kids having fun and none of us cared about it.

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    1. River, that is great and the more I am reading here, the less I think it does mean much.

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  7. Dressing up was a fundamental part of growing up in our house, oh la ! the photos I have...the best fun ever. I've never seen any weird comments here Andrew!

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    1. Grace, after giving them a good chance, I began actively discouraging them, shall I say.

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  8. For every troll I can see that you have about a million mates (in the flesh and online) who see you only as a complete (and unique and interesting and intelligent) package. Me included.

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    1. Kath, that is one of the nicest things anyone has ever said. You did leave out incredibly handsome, but one reason I like you is that you don't tell untruths.

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  9. You're gay, well I never ;)
    Love ya guts x

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    1. Fen, I used to be. Now I am not so sure. I may be asexual. I must confess, I sat on this post for a while before publishing it.

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    2. I think I'm asexual too, it's the best way to be :)

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  10. Ha! I read the title and thought this was a coming out post!! What weird social planet do those who think it their right to have others announce their sexuality AND approve/disapprove of it actually come from?

    Ditto Kath.

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    1. Red, I've never come out because I was never really in. Slightly coded, I never have trouble with straight guys who are confident in the own sexuality.

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  11. There might be hope sometimes.

    Maybe a miracle will happen; these prejudice people might read your blog; then slowly their minds might open a little.

    I guess it all depends on why they're reading and commenting.

    If they totally dislike you and are commenting just to harass you; there's not much hope.

    If they are commenting because they like MOST things about you; then maybe one day they'll grow more accepting of homosexuality.

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    1. Dina, I like the idea that by reading my blog, some people's minds are opened a little.

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