Thursday, July 26, 2012

The Revolta

I suppose our vacuum cleaner is about thirty years old. There was a time when I was reluctant to invest in a packet of five dust bags as I was sure the vacuum cleaner was about to pack it in. The chapp in the shop where I buy the bags assured me I could bring them back if it failed. Its brand is Volta, which I think is owned by Electrolux, but who owns Electrolux? General Electric? Hoover?

The Electrolux headquarters used to be located at the corner of Alexandra Avenue and Chapel Street but on the site are now smart apartments. I remember the real estate agent who sold our house in Balaclava lived in those apartments at the time. He heard a ruckass one night and from his balcony he saw lads jump into the river. He did not see them drown but they did, after being chased to the river bank by some fellow night club patrons.

I affectionately christened our vacuum cleaner as The Revolta. Gee it has served us well. We had to replace its foot, the thing at the end of the tube once, but otherwise, it has never gone wrong. It is old and shabby now, rather like us, but it still performs.

In its time it has vacuumed up bits of concrete and dust, dirt of all descriptions, wood shavings, in fact just about everything imaginable. When we had two dogs and two cats and I used it daily to vacuum up pet hair, I cleaned its filters often as it would blow out pet smells into the house.

Now it does a weekly vacuum, if it is lucky and I can be bothered, and picks up sock fluff and maybe a crumb or two from a biscuit.

You could describe it as semi retired. It had a busy life. There was always something new for it to pick up, new house corners to investigate, sometimes really hard work when we were doing full on house renovations, like knocking down a solid brick wall. It has dealt with new carpet fluff from perhaps five different new carpets. Even here, when we moved here, the little trodden on carpet was still fluffing badly.

The Revolta has vacuumed up the detritus of our lives and still does. I think it must have also sucked up a bit of our moods at times, but of course it did not keep them as the bag was thrown away.

But you know, it still works as well as the day we bought it. It is a fully functioning. Nothing tells me that it could not last another thirty years. Somewhat maudlin, but I hope I am around to keep it in use.


  1. I envy you your long and happy relationship with Revolta. Why do all the vacs I take up with turn out to be so fickle?

  2. 'It is old and shabby now, rather like us, but it still performs.'

    Ok, we know you are shabby but you left unanswered whether you still perform.

  3. I worked at that Electrolux factory for a short while and at Godfreys in South Caulfield for a long while where old cleaners arrived on the back of a truck to be reconditioned. It was a dirty filthy job but I liked it until the manager who wore a cheap wig suddenly decided he was Hitler and would work us to death.
    A bloke was fatally hacked up outside those smart apartments, an event which got the residents mighty indignant at the time, two other blokes (they were all being chased) jumped into the river to avoid the same treatment and one of them drowned. The attackers and victims were all Asian, some travelling around with machetes in the boots of their cars.
    The trouble began in a nightclub off Church Street which was later closed down because of too much violence.
    I want them all closed down. I know from the inside that they're huge retail outlets for illicit drugs.
    As a Christian hater you have a narrow reason for condemning a vast philosophy. And writing Christian as christian, how childish. A little tantrum. If there's anymore of it I'll never comment here again. Say good riddance if you like, right now.

  4. FC, I suppose it was quite expensive when we bought it. I guess only a mega expensive one now would last the distance.

    Victor, goes without saying surely.

    RH, Salt nightclub was in Claremont Street, South Yarra. They are indeed where a lot of drugs are sold. I don't hate and I don't reserve my dislike for christianity. I dislike all religions, especially when they are practised with zeal and bad things are done in the name of religion.

  5. Andrew there's much to learn from your style.

    I withdraw what I said.

  6. I take nothing for granted Andrew.

  7. Hello Andrew:
    What a touching post. We should certainly love Revolta too if she had worked without complaint or breakdown in thirty years. Oh, if only all housekeepers were so reliable!

    And, if Revolta could speak, what fascinating tales she could tell of the High Life in the High Rise!

  8. Careful RH. I might end up liking you.

    Very wise of you Victor.

    Unfortunately Jane and Lance, Revolta requires a very hands on attendance.

  9. Here we go again. Christianity is NOT a religion. It is a way of living and believing. Catholic, Protestant, Baptist, Methodist, Lutheran etc are all religions and all are Christian. When you fill out a form that asks for your religion, you do not write christianity, you write Church of England or whatever religion you belong to.

  10. A Holden is not a car.

    Miss River's Teutonic ancestry: the inclination to quibble.

  11. It is a point River. But isn't it complicated when Jews call themselves a race.

  12. ooh my Nan has an orange one of those and it's still going strong.

  13. Orange! Beige was all the go when we bought ours. Everything was beige.

  14. 'Viva la Revolta' long may she suck!

  15. A she Grace? I have never considered the sex of our vacuum cleaner. But as it cleans, it must be a she.