Monday, December 05, 2011

Wedding oddities

The setting was excellent choice, at Sis in Law's, on a lawn bordered by a circular driveway and rose beds and the front fence. A white marquee had been erected, one with three open sides for the ceremony. Older guests had chairs on the lawn to sit on while the rest of the 120 stood on the driveway. The theme colours were lilac and purple and the colours worked quite well.

In the centre of the marquee stood the groom, with his and Sis in Law's combined seven children either side of him. Dreaded Nephew escorted his mother to centre stage and vows were taken. My ears pricked up when the celebrant said something like, marriage being a legally binding whatever between a man and a woman. I nudged Bone Doctor who was standing beside me. "Is this where we should jump and down and protest?" We didn't.

I felt an eye rolling moment when each of the nine of the wedding group poured different coloured sands into a glass vase. But as it went on, I thought it was very strong symbolism. The different coloured sands can never be separated. Very nice idea indeed.

What was odd? R was concerned that his suit did not look right. Don't worry R, there will be at least one person there in jeans. There were more than one.

Four young women were wearing absurd shoes. Now, if you are going to wear very high heels, please make sure you can walk elegantly in them. If you teeter or wobble or have an odd posture when wearing heels, stick to your ugg boots.

The sky was overcast and cool breeze was gently blowing. Had it have been sunny and hot, we would have all cooked while standing there. Had it rained, well, I don't know what would have happened. They really gambled on the weather and won.

Is it appropriate for guests to hold a stubby of beer while the ceremony is proceeding? I wouldn't have thought so, but at least four men and one women had one in their hands, taking the occasional swig.

There seemed to be two female professional photographers. They may well have been amateurs and friends of the bride, I don't know. But they had big cameras multiple lenses. They were nicely dressed, but neither had shoes on. They moved around the lawn snapping away in stockinged feet.

Chainsaw Niece read a speech. Oh no, I said to Bone Doctor. CN never stops talking and rarely finishes one sentence before starting another. I can occasionally make sense of what she saying. So why get her to read the speech? She read it perfectly, well paced, loud enough to be heard and with good diction, yet it did not sound rehearsed. Another really nice moment.

The truly surprising thing was that among the 120 guests, not one phone rang or beeped during the ceremony.

We adjourned to the side and open area of the house for drinks and nibbles, which lasted about thirty minutes, and then we headed off to the reception, a very short drive away. Although we left as soon as we had eaten, there were still speeches to come, telegrams to read and a band to play for dancing.

I wandered off from the reception with thoughts of throwing myself in the creek if I did not get food soon. The creek is tidal and breeds fabulously large mosquitoes. Although the camera decided to focus on a twig rather than the distance, the local Pelican Cafe can just be seen. Damn, I just googled it. It is famous for fish and chips. I could have gone and gotten some.

I changed my mind about jumping into the creek when I realised how muddy it was. Mud a pretty corpse does not make. The creek is tidal and under a bridge seawater was pouring in through a narrow opening. The park on the opposite bank looked very peaceful and inviting. I think R took the bride and groom there for photos to be taken.

Public halls in the country are to be treasured. This one is in excellent condition and was just the right size.


  1. A few pairs of jeans, some stubbie drinkers and starvation whilst waiting for photos to be taken and reception to start = Aussie wedding!

  2. Nothing worse than being hungry at a wedding. & kids????? I think Tradie brother may be better off.

  3. Should be 7 kids.

  4. A phone free event of any sort is a blessed thing. It might be a good omen for the couple.

  5. you now know to stash a muesli bar in your pocket before the next big event, but the nibbles before the reception was a good touch, and I always think wine should be served as guests gather before a wedding.
    all lovely and what a surprise.

  6. I'm amazed to hear that no-one's phone went off. That shows quite a lot of respect from everyone who attended.

  7. Same sex marriage will legal soon the PM has been told to support it about time i say :-).

  8. I hate this new wedding thing where the Bride & Groom go off for hours for wedding photos. At least you had some food while waiting for the reception, I've been to two weddings where most of us ended up in the pub after the ceremony.
    It is acceptable for stubbies at a wedding as long as the stubby holder is white and the stubby has a white ribbon around the neck. It's in the Bogan Etiquette Book.

  9. Kath, it does seem to be the form now.

    Well Diana, the three of his own are never too far away from him. Complicated, as these things always are.

    FruitCake, I was just so surprised.

    Brownie, better I just stay at home I think.

    River, oh that they were all so nice. I expect it was a co-incidence.

    Windsmoke, as I have said, I don't care for myself, but I do care for others if they want to.

    JahTeh, it wasn't the case with this wedding. They were only briefly absent. Pub after ceremony. My father used to do that for weddings and funerals. And not a bad idea at all. Not so bogan, they were drinking Crown stubbies rather than Carlton Draught. They makes a difference, hey.