Sunday, January 16, 2011

Hand Bags

Women's hand bags are very personal things. I know of some women who won't even let their partner into their handbag. Sister and Bone Doctor don't use handbags. Little Jo does.

Women's hand bags are mysterious things to me. I know a little of Mother's though.

Mother's hand bag can produce a Band Aid, a Disprin, paracetamol, barley sugar, Minties, handkerchief, bills to be paid, tissues both new and used, Kool cigarettes and Redhead matches, newspaper or magazine cuttings, photos, chewing gum, liquid and powder make up, lipstick, an eyebrow pencil, a pensioner card, assorted pills, innumerable spectacles which are always the wrong ones and a disabled parking permit.

Sadly Mother's hand bag can never produce anything like a pen, cash or credit card, a telephone, an address book, a public transport ticket, a taxi concession card.

I suppose none of the above are unusual. But then I don't know what else might be in there.

What unusual thing do you carry in your handbag? Or I suppose pockets if you are a bloke.


  1. Anonymous2:12 pm

    I know of some women whose partner wouldn't even fit in their handbag.

    And I don't think I really want to know what some blokes carry in their handbag.

    Ventolin - groan.

  2. I believe a woman's handbag is a bottomless pit or a black hole for junk and weights the same as a house brick. You asked me in a previous post whether i still walk the streets of Moonee Ponds, I did until i got my driving licence and bought a car back in the 70's.

  3. Before marrying any woman, a smart man will tip out her bag and if it is full of old rubbish then that is a clue to how life with her will be.
    For women, a guy's car is a big clue: is it neat or full of laundry and beer cans etc.
    How do men cope without a carry-bag?
    spectacles. sunglasses. wallet/cards/coin purse, comb, phone, hankie, camera, emery board, pen, notebook, a paperback novel, Vline and Melb Public Transport maps.
    band aid and stamps in the wallet.
    MYKI, baby DELL 9-inch laptop.
    Be Prepared.

  4. Andrew, thanks for your question on the Captain Cook Bridge. Yes the last last punt service between Taren Point and Sans Souci was on May 27th 1965. The service carried 26 cars at a time and 1000 cars a day before the bridge opened.

  5. I've thought about this on and off all day and, sad to say, I think my handbag is relatively vanilla with the usual crap of keys, purse, diary, pens/pencils/note paper, sometimes the folded white stick (but I prefer to carry it at a defensive angle near ankles), etc.
    Not bad for someone who used to carry a slim line wallet in their back pocket up until 5 years ago.

  6. I always carry a notebook in case I get a writing idea and a camera because there's often something intriguing or funny or interesting or just plain weird to snap.

    My mother has everything your mother has plus packets of sugar and napkins that she snaffles from cafes. For some reason it is important that no hot beverage go unsweetened or hands unwiped.

  7. Anonymous6:53 pm

    I, too, always have a ventolin puffer in my bag - and a small screwdriver to put back in the screws which always fall out of my sunnies! Said sunnies are always with me too. As is a small umbrella because the weather here is so unpredicable. V.

  8. When my handbag turned into a Bermuda triangle, I switched to a backpack! Small enough to carry easily, large enough to fit 'extras' in.

    Sadly the extended family now relies on me & my backpack for anything THEY don't want to carry when we go out. So ... extra wallets, reading glasses, keys. Sunnies, painkillers. Tissues, hankies, wet ones. Then there's the fun of unpacking it at the end of the outing and returning everything to its rightful owner ...

  9. My handbag is a mini backpack and has a small folder with many bus tickets, ipod, lip balm, locker key, house keys when I'm out,comb, bandaids, tissues, hanky, panadol, migraine tablets, ventolin, antihistamines, my daughter's spare house keys, (and she has mine), purse, small coin purse, folded "green" shopping bag, toothbrush, camera, (when I'm out), phone, nail file, safety pins, book to read while I'm waiting for anything, notepad and pen, sometimes a sandwich and bottle of water. Nothing too unusual. Oh, the tape measure.

  10. Oh, yeah. Forgot to say that. I actually have a backpack, too. But only the top half if my 'handbag', the bottom half being my 'camerabag'. But in there I do have a screwdriver!!

    Yeehah ... I have to walk with a hiking-poke to keep me in a straight line, so a b-p was kinda essential.

  11. Ah Julie, the manbag. You are right, you don't want to know.

    Windsmoke, yes invariably women's handbags are heavy. So you found a new source of income once you bought a car.

    Emstacks, much to R's annoyance, I am very prone to carry a plastic supermarket bag with my bits and pieces in it.

    Thanks J Bar. I would have checked back. I was a bit surprised a bridge wasn't built earlier.

    Jayne, modern technology has added a phone and a camera to what we have to carry.

    Kath, while I like the notebook, I type brief notes into my phone as a text message and then save them as drafts. My mother may well have some sugar packets too.

    V, you have had those sunnies a long time, loose screws and all. I only learnt recently that Sister uses Ventolin, because she left her puffer here.

    Red, when we are on holidays, one of us carries a backpack that contains joint stuff. It ain't me. See, I am not such a control freak if I can let others carry my stuff.

    River, you are very close to having the ultimate handbag/backpack. You'd be useful to have around.

    Hiking pole Julie? Is that what they are called now :-P

  12. I have a shoulder bag, about A3 size, which is good. Only has 4 compartments in which to lose stuff.

    Losing stuff isn't a problem, leaving behind the bag in the past 2-3 years of using it I've left it behind in pubs, cafs and restaurants. The easiest one was when the waitress at a Hobart caf chased me up the street bag in hand. The worst was at the pub where Jason Moran met his demise. Didn't realise it was missing until next morning. Went back to the pub early in the morning and rang my mobile in case it has been nicked or picked up and ditched. No joy. Rang the pub when it opened. No sign of it, but was advised that the night staff, one of whom may have picked it up weren't back till later.

    Duly cancelled the assorted cards.

    Later in the day a call from the pub letting me know that it had been found alongside the chair I was sitting on and had been placed in the office.

    Uncancelling cards was apparently not possible. That was a pain - but a self inflicted wound.

    My question is, are sheilas hard wired to handle handbags? Blokes - well this one at least - appear not to be.

  13. Not accusin' or anything, but I think alcohol and losing things in public are often connected. But yes, women are hard wired to handle handbags. I have seen the drunkest scrags imaginable, a shoe in one hand, the other lost, but always with their handbag. PS I'd be careful where you drink. You don't want the title of 'colourful racing identity'.

  14. I hate handbags, often I'll just use one of those "green" shopping bags. But I do have a handbag, I only use it half of the time. I usually have my purse, phone, tissues, lip gloss, post its, notepad, keys, pens and glasses/sunglasses. I empty it regularly coz stuff gets lost in there otherwise.

  15. I can beat all, I currently am carrying a detached large toe nail in my bag.

    Memo to self: stay away from Lord Sedgwick and his large plates of meat.

  16. Better than me Fen. I usually just have a plastic shopping bag. R hates it.

    Yuk Jahteh. Can it be re-attached? That is why you are keeping it? You and LS been out dancing? How sweet.

  17. I carry an 0ld fashioned fold out fan - like the belles of the deep south used to carry - Lippie, Rescue remedy, lots of paper dockets - a small notebook, biro, cheque books and all manner of plastic loyalty cards which I never remember to use - a big comb with with a hair band wrapped round its handle - just in case its too windy and can't see, a small card size book with about 50 card sized photos - a rock a hammer and a knife - sometimes I put a vacumn cleaner in there just for kicks - oh and a grand piano

  18. Lady Bracknell summed up handbags in a nutshell. A nutshell handbag no doubt.

    "Mr. Worthing. I must confess that I feel somewhat bewildered by what you have just told me. To be born, or at any rate bred in a handbag, whether it have handles or not, seems to me to display a contempt for the ordinary decencies of family life which reminds one of the worst excesses of the French revolution, and I presume you know what that unfortunate movement led to?"

  19. It is heavy then MC. I love that you carry a fan.

    One of my all time fave plays LS. A HANDBAG! Go Dame Edith.