Thursday, June 29, 2006

Rehearsed and planned

This was the conversation, no lecture, that I had to have. I thought it would help, I am not sure if it did and I don't really know if was a good idea. Cliche coming. At the end of the day, I hoped she would be smarter about it all than I was.

Niece is staying.

'A, I have heard you are having a bit of trouble about your mum and dad seperating.'

She naturally asked from who. Ah, your dad or was it your mum, or nanna Fud, (my mum). Sorry, forget.

She, niece, had said that she wanted nothing to do with her father's new girlfriend. She declared she would never ever have anything to do with her. Lucky that it turned out to be a brief affair really, albeit very ego boosting for my brother.

You are fourteen. I was fourteen when my parents seperated. That is your Nanna Fud and the late Poppy Wal. I vowed and declared that I would have nothing to do with my father's new girlfriend.

Thirty years later, or about that, I am fond of the person who went on to become my stepmother and will drive next weekend for a couple of hours to see her in the northern part of our state.

The point that I hope I got across, is to not make instant judgements. They are both going through difficult times. Yes, your parents should know everything and behave pefectly, but they don't always. Your, dear niece, behaviour will not have a lot of impact. Just be clever, don't judge, they need to sort it out themsleves.

I have heard that she is behaving badly at school and at home and does not have a close friend.

Most cruelly, I think she knows it all full well, and any behaviour on her part is motivated by self interest.


1 comment:

  1. I'm like that now. In 02 my father revealed he'd had a number of affairs and that my parents were seperating. He now lives over the river and drops by at home now and then. It's a civilised arrangement (him visiting home), but I don't want to know that bitch's name or even see her face. This is after six years. I'm happy for her to be this "thing" as apposed to a human. People have said it will change, but as far as I'm concerned, that wall is staying put.