You knew you were't get away with just one long post about Mother, didn't you.
I don't know how much detail would make a good blog post, but I am sure a list of what has happened in the last week would not be a good blog post.
Mother is in the care of a very good private hospital and is indulging in diva like behaviour, to the extent that for one day staff popped her into a freezer and ignored her for a day.
Nevertheless, the staff have been wonderful to her, as Mother admits. Her co-habitee in the hospital is 93, nearly blind and nearly deaf but Mother and she are great mates. They both think Nurse Ray is wonderful and Betty said to Mother, there is no harm in flirting with such a lovely young man. It's not like I can do anything now. Hmm, Betty has good taste. He is quite hot and clearly straight.
Mother lays it on thick with R, and gets him both distressed at her problems but also annoyed at how manipulative she is. He didn't really mean it, but he has been saying that she is evil.
She calculates and manipulates constantly, which does not work much for any of her children, but it does for me through R who says I must do certain things for her.
Tradie Brother is going to install handrails at her place, donated by Mother's friend who also donated a very good wheeled walker frame. Mother was supposed to go home today, Friday, and R had taken a day off his volunteer work to take her, but her doctor said no Mrs C, you can't go home until your handrails are installed. But when I spoke to Tradie Brother today, he said Mother's occupational therapist told him she insisted on staying in hospital for the weekend. Who to believe? I doesn't really matter though.
I spoke frankly to Mother one night on the phone and told her that she is in good care and that there are a lot of services to support her to continue to live at home. But she needs to take her medications as prescribed and she needs to listen to advice, and frankly there was a cross tone to my voice. Next day, she called Sister and was in tears about what her cruel older son said. She told Sister to call me to tell me that if we were going to visit, she might be out, visiting her home with her OT to see what can be done to improve her situation at home. She initially said, I'm not doing that. I will be too upset. Seems she changed her mind. R answered the phone call from Sister, and told Sister a few hard truths.
I could bang on at length, but at the end of day, she is my mother and I will do what I have to do. She can manage at home for now with some professional support. She has always been spoilt, by her parents, my father and his brother, other people and late Step Father. She is now an increasingly frail old lady who is quite justifiably frightened about her future.