Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Nipple Phone

I am happy with my new phone but an odd thing happens at times. When a message or whatever arrives, the screen self activates and with a swipe you can read whatever is there. All very standard, but if I have my phone in my top pocket and I am moving, such as walking or driving, apparently the screen thinks my nipple is a finger and starts doing things.

I arrived at work one day and I was aware of heat on my chest. My phone was red hot and there were at least half a dozen apps doing things on the phone at once. As I use the phone as a watch, I like the screen facing inwards so that I can just lift it from my pocket to check the time. Now I have to keep the screen facing outward so that the phone does not get busy.

32 comments:

  1. I have a straight best mate who would, I know, a nipple phone

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  2. You could wear a bra maybe?

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    1. I was just kidding, but you are cracking me up with the thought of it. I think you should contact the phone maker and complain! I reach into my purse for my phone and many times, end up, just by touching it to pull it out, calling someone without intention. Then comes the frantic scramble to stop the call.

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    2. I don't even know why men have nipples. Does anyone know?

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    3. All foetuses start out as female then 51% of them develop male characteristics. But the original female functions, like nipples and brains, remain residually.

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    4. Strayer, I don't quite need a bra yet, but who knows if I put on weight. Yes, I used to do that, especially with one particular phone. My sister in law was at the top of my phone book and she often received an accidental call.

      Thank you Hels.

      Diane, always humour in the every day.

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  3. Nipple phone and butt phone. Common problems. Thankfully I haven't seen nipple cam or butt cam. Yet.

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    1. EC, that could potentially happen, I suppose.

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  4. Andrew, I know it happens..

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  5. Your phone thinks your nipple is a finger??? Hope it doesn't get too cold, you'd poke a hole right through it!

    (Hehe, couldn't resist.)

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    1. Jac, cold or aroused, I need to be careful.

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  6. Does that happen even if you have a passcode to get into the phone?A passcode prevents anyone else or any nipple from getting into your phone.

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    1. Diane, non it wouldn't happen, unless the nipple knew the code. I only have my sim card locked.

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  7. I had a dream the other night that my phone was doing things secretly without my knowledge.. so this post is quite terrifying to me. :)

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    1. Snoskred, it is quite possible for someone to operate your phone remotely, so your dreams are not misplaced.

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  8. Hahaha! That's an awful lot of nipp!e talk before noon :) oh hang on it's 20 minutes after.. carry on :)

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    1. Grace, yes Carry On ......

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  9. Or you could buy nipple guards (*~*)

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    1. River, I seem to recall Madonna wearing things like that.

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  10. Your phone has a mind of it's own - yes a slight movement will set the phone off, that's why I have a cover for mine.

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    1. As do most people Margaret. I am such a rebel without a cover.

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  11. wouldnt a screen lock fix your problem?

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    1. Carol, I am sure it would but it too much bother every time I would look at my phone. It does have fingerprint recognition, but I've never looked at it.

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  12. I'm so glad I keep my phone in my handbag - maybe you should.......oh maybe not lol

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    1. Cathy, it is many years since I have carried a manbag.

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  13. Good in winter like a personal heater.
    Merle...........

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  14. Good lateral thinking, Merle.

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  15. ohhh *clamps mouth shut*

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    Replies
    1. Fen, my imagination is running riot.

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