Saturday, May 16, 2015

Deporting Depp's Dogs

Apparently Johnny Depp has twice been voted the sexiest man alive. As he deplaned upon his arrival in Australia, I just saw a fat arsed old dude, well past his prime. Maybe his clothes were unflattering. There is no doubt he was cute when he was young. I rather liked him back in 21 Jump Street days. What did Patsy say? Buns so tight he was bouncing off the walls.



Change.org has been successful in some very worthy campaigns, but its peremptory petition to save Depp's dogs from being murdered by Australian authorities was a little premature and does the organisation no benefit if it wants to be taken seriously. Really, as if Australian authorities would put down Depp's dogs. Not a chance in hell.

R's brother in law in England told me he was a fan of our Border Patrol tv show, if that is what it is called. It is a show that films people getting caught trying to bring contraband, drugs, illegal food and plants and even animals into Australia. He said he wished the UK would get tough like Australia is tough. I did not want to disappoint him by pointing out it is just a tv show and those who appear on it are most likely paid, after they are fined a minuscule amount for their naughtiness. I expect our customs and especially the department that protects our flora and fauna from foreign disease is much like that of other western countries.

That is, it ain't so special and waves through VIPs as clearly they would not have anything to be concerned about. It is only because of a bragging dog washer that Depp was caught out falsifying Customs paperwork to bring in his pooches and put our country at risk of rabies and other diseases. Otherwise, who would have known?

One law for the rich and famous, another for the rest of us. I do rather wonder how often this has happened in the past? Did Michael Jackson bring his monkeys to Australia? 

I don't care who they are and most of us would surely agree, no one is immune from our immigration and customs laws, be they celebrities, politicians or kings and queens. 

Australia has though cleverly shot the doggie drama (no pun there, really) back to the US . We have told the dogs they must leave and they have already. What will the US do when the dogs arrive back to LA Airport? It seems the dogs might be stateless. Oh no, the US is going to murder Depp's dogs! We need another Change.org petition.

My personal apologies to you for participating in such a distraction of the masses but nevertheless, shame on our slack arsed authorities.

Note, the names of the involved authorities may not be correct. I never know who does what at the airport.

49 comments:

  1. Australia is very good (or should that be bad?) at picking on celebrities. From preventing Frank Sinatra leaving the country for his 'hookers' comment through any number of nameless (to me) rock stars and their drug preferences there is a media storm waiting to happen at the drop of a hat (or the import of a dog).

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    1. Victor, I think the publicity generally, not so much the Sinatra matter, is good. It keeps people aware of the laws, especially bio-security, and their importance to Australia and must be a deterrent to other rich and famous people from doing the same. I get cross when watching those tv shows where people deliberately defy the law and bring in food and plant material, and then they are only given a warning or fined a couple of hundred dollars.

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    2. I cannot believe that you love Border Control. What I see on that program is endless episodes of bullying by entitled-by-the-badge and racist-stereotyping little-corporal types, especially of people who quite often will not have appreciated what is caught in the quarantine proscriptions of traditional items and even foodstuffs they have brought as presents or mementos, and the subsequent screening of the story is in fact a part of that bullying and abuse.

      I very much doubt that the people filmed are paid. In fact, when you go into the customs hall at the terminal there is a sign saying that the program is being filmed (in an area, incidentally, where you are prohibited from using a camera or a mobile phone) and the onus is put on you to say that you do not want to be filmed. Even people with nothing to hide want to get out of that hall with as little special attention as possible. Who would ever dare go up to a film crew and say "sorry, I do not want to be filmed." After that, if you become the object of official attention, you are subject to a process of legal compulsion and it is absolutely wrong for the program to take advantage of that as a source of TV entertainment.

      Whilst the penalties for quarantine breaches are mostly minor, those for drugs can be draconian. I shall not even get started on the pointlessness of that particular war.

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    3. Marcellous, I never said I love the show. It is on and I glance at it occasionally as I sit at the computer. There is a simple question on the inbound card, do you have food, printed in many languages. They are Australian residents returning. Of course they known they aren't allowed to bring in food and products from overseas. I am curious as to why you would go in to bat for them. Yes, it is racial stereotyping, because they are who offend, Indians and Asians in particular and not the 80 year old Mavis from Bombala who gets tested for explosives. On my second overseas trip I confessed to the authorities that I had some chewing gum after wondering whether it was food stuff.

      I am generally a shy and retiring type, but if I had something with me that was perhaps illegal, I would certainly ask to not be filmed...... and hence draw attention to myself, I suppose. I am surprised that with your knowledge that in Australia people can be pilloried without their direct consent, not just agreeing to be filmed. It only makes sense if they get paid.

      I don't disagree with you about the pointlessness of the war on drugs.

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    4. Sorry to accuse you of loving the program. Actually I realised I had got that wrong when I typed it and that in fact it was R's relative, but I forgot to go back and fix it up.

      I see we disagree on the facts as to whether the "participants" get paid although neither of us actually knows. Why should they be paid? It is a fallacy that people need to be paid to be filmed. At least, I am unaware of any legal requirement that they be paid and in fact the legal requirements go the other way: if they have done something bad they could hardly be paid without it being the proceeds of crime and then being taken off them.

      Put it another way: once the film was taken, how could you ever stop the TV people from using it if they wanted to? Despite what you say, I think the opportunity to stop the filming in the first place is a false one because apart from you even the most virtuous want to keep a low profile and go through customs with the least attention and disruption possible.

      Some of the people are Australian residents but many aren't and don't speak good English and I squirm to see the way they are treated on that front even if it turns out they are doing the wrong thing. And I most certainly don't think it should be turned into entertainment on the TV any more than actual police interrogations of suspects for many more serious crimes should be. That's not because I am going into bat for smugglers or quarantine busters or criminals.

      You have hit the nail on the head with chewing gum - is that "food"? You don't swallow it, do you? Are boiled lollies (eg, cough lollies) "food"? Chocolate seems more like food to me, but where do you draw the line?

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    5. It is interesting that neither of us knows, and nor does the general public, about the circumstances under which people appear on the show. I'm afraid I have little sympathy for most who are caught importing substances that threaten our bio-security. Most know exactly what they are doing is illegal and wrong. I guess customs draws the line over what is food and if in doubt, declare it. This could lead you to be delayed, probably un-necessarily, so it is easier to just not bring things in. Generally I don't swallow...err gum.

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  2. Hear Hear Andrew - doesn't matter who you are or to use an old phrase ' what your station in life is' Quarantine is a very important issue for an island 'state' - especially to ones thay does not have diseases that are rampant (and harmful), Breaking quarantine laws is a no no. For once I agreed with a politician - loved the way Barnaby J told Johnny to bugger off and take his dogs with him! Good on him!!
    Border Patrol was being filmed at Tullamarine last time we flew im (international) and there were signs all over the baggage collection area informing 'BP is being recorded and to notify the 'staff' if you do not want to be filmed', so I assumed it was legit and all those 'taking part' were actual passengers up to no good (or not as is often the case)
    Cathy

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    1. Cathy, I had no real issue with what Joyce said either. While he is master of self publicity, some frank talking as he did will do no harm at all. I don't actually know if people get paid by the tv producers when they are filmed after being caught bringing something in they shouldn't, but why otherwise would they agree to be shown on tv and go through the ridicule and embarrassment?

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    2. Did forget to mention maybe some of the aiport officials need a refresher course in baggage screening especially womens handbags lol

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    3. Hi Cathy - my guess is that the travellers who get fined, then agree to release the film as it pays their fine for them. always follow the money for an answer to The Question Why?.
      Rich friend, much travelled, elderly, just vowed Never Again after her Canada Rail Cruise group was viciously body searched and the man with metal hips was not believed and stripped. Canadia eh?

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    4. Cathy, women's handbags must be a nightmare for security. I know you have a sharp nail file tucked away in your handbag and you will stab someone.

      Em Stacks, that is quite plausible. You do realise we are going to Canada for our hols, Thanks heaps.

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  3. Both our countries know, all too well, the price of not protecting our biospheres; that someone in such a prominent position chooses to flout those laws is an insult to good sense.
    Depp's inner redneck is not aging gracefully as it fights it's way to the fore, isn't it.

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    1. Jac, I don't think I could ever think of Depp as redneck, but maybe the cap does fit.

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  4. Yes Andrew, I was suggesting that Depp was unfairly picked on just that the media loves to inflame these situations and the community generally picks up on the outrage (whether for or against).

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    1. Of course, I meant 'wasn't'! The comments box is fighting me this morning.

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    2. Victor, that is what media do, which is fine with me, unless in the unlikely even that a nothing person like me was on the receiving end.

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  5. For such a popular actor I do hope he has the good sense to apologise? Can't wait to see the political cartoons in today's papers. Have a great weekend Andrew.

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    1. Carol, I think an apology is in order, now he and the mutts are safely back home.

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  6. He was good in Benny and Joon. But not sexy.

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    1. Susie, I don't know that movie or whatever it was. Pleased to know he is a good actor.

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  7. Great publicity really for Johnny. He would know that dogs need to be quarantined surely.
    People bring all kinds of illegal items/objects into Tasmania and usually get caught...there are a few 'things' that we can't take to Victoria but it does change.

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    1. WA, I suspect many don't get caught how bring things into Tassie. Some get caught, but I bet the bulk of them get away with it. Of course he and his minders would know about the dogs. It was a flagrant breach that he almost got away with.

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  8. Stupid indiscreet dog washers.

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    1. Ad Rad, isn't it better that he was caught out?

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  9. It's made for some great one liners and everybody loves to bash a rich pretty boy who breaks the rules wantonly because he feels enttitled. Hawaii's quarantine rules are six months!

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    1. Strayer, that is severe in Hawaii. I think it is only ten days here after the appropriate paperwork. Rich pretty boy? He was once. He is no longer a pretty boy and can be equated to a sad old queen behaving like a young gay queen.

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    2. Still seems good looking to me, I'll say.

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  10. I think this story says more about Johnny Depp's arrogance than the quality of our our immigration and customs laws. When a person is applying for a visa into Australia, he/she is informed IN DETAIL about food, animals, plantlife etc. Then they are sprayed in the plane. Then they have to fill out a detailed customs form and sign it. Then they are inspected at the airport.

    How could he have not known about how vulnerable we are to outside disease? Or didn't he care?

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    1. Hels, do you really think he would read such stuff? Do you think he would fill in any sort of documentation personally? He arrived on a private jet and will call customs on why private jets seem to be exempt from our laws.

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  11. all those horses who died slowly in pain from a virus trekked to them by an idiot govt quarantine inspector who did not wash/change his boots after leaving some racehorses which had come in from Japan. One effect was 1800 people/horses in a week long lockdown at a QLD horse show. FFS.
    Now those Jap racehorses were not sick. They were probably cleaner than we are. but the idiot carried their manure via his boots to Australian horses and the whole thing cost the nation millions of dollars.
    Depp is a scruffy faithless (imagine leaving Vanessa Paradis FFS) lowlife whose main appeal is that he mimicked Keith Richards.

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    1. Wise words as always from you Em Stacks. Yes, about the horses. I remember that.

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  12. Arrogant oxygen thief. I will be interested to hear what he has to say about the whole shemozzle. And am not expecting him to be contrite or apologise.
    I hope he is fined. Big bucks.

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    1. EC, I think he does owe us a mea culpa and a please explain, followed by an apology. Once home, hopefully he will.

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  13. Tom and Lorenzo once referred to Johnny Depp as an elderly gay windchime. :)

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    1. Snoskred, I have no idea who those people are, but Depp is married, or with a female partner at least, so any gay rumours are thoroughly quashed.........or are they?

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  14. These stars think they are above the law. I'm glad they got caught and he doesn't do anything for me now or when he was young.

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    1. Diane, circling my nipples with a wet fingertip, what sort of man does do things for you?

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  15. JD and current temporary partner were idiots for smuggling in their dogs. Australia, of course had to make a stand and what better way to publicise your quarantine requirements than by making an example. Quite correct, but I did find that portly man speaking on behalf of your government rather pompous and annoying. Interesting about BP - C likes it too and thinks the same as R's family - you are much stricter than we are. We have our own BP and our agents are terrible... and we don't award instant fines as you do for infingements. That would seem to be an easy way to find funding for extra border agents.

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    1. Craig, I am not sure which portly man you refer to. We have rather a lot of portly politicians. If it was Barnaby Joyce, he is a tosser. The alternative to on the spot fines is court. Yes, I would like to see that. We were collared at Heathrow as cigarette smugglers. We had none. Meanwhile huge quantities of cigs come in to the UK from Europe.

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    2. Yes that was him. I found him instantly annoying. Sounds about right for our BP - stop the innocent travelers while criminals swan past.

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  16. Andrew, the sad is in every conuntry around the world it is a law for rich and for the rest.. Why rich are better than others

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    1. Gosia, that is really what it is about.

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  17. Johnny Depp was very cute in 21 Jump Street and I liked him as Captain Jack Sparrow in the pirates of the Caribbean movies, but I don't think he qualifies as the sexiest man alive.
    As for his dogs, all he had to do was declare them, have them serve their quarantine period and he could have kept them here while filming whatever it is he is filming.
    Trying to beat the system just isn't done when it comes to health and safety issues for our country.

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    1. River, I did not realise how long he had been here. He could have easily gone through the quarantine process for his dogs. The rules aren't so onerous.

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    2. He is filming here until late June-early July I believe on yet another Pirates of the Caribbean film.

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  18. I like Johnny Depp and think he is a good actor but he should obey our rules just the same as everyone else.
    We take a lot of flack when we flex our little muscles but we should do it all the same as.
    Merle.............

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    1. Merle, as you say, little muscles but we do need to flex them over matters like that.

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  19. He's not my cup of tea Andrew but I'm not one to be impressed by celebrity.. with the exception of Ewan McGregor, he impresses me very much :) Can't believe the press coverage, guess it takes away from the budget humdrum!

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    1. Grace, while I know who Ewan is and seen him, I have never had a closer look at him I shall. Yes, a great distraction from the budget.

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