Saturday, April 30, 2011
White Wedding. I like it.
Surprising to you perhaps, but we are not into camping or anything else that involves a temporary erection.
Comes down to cabin in a caravan park or a motel.
Now you have your foreign types in greater Melbourne. Melbourne is absolutely chockers with them. You can recognise them by the skin colour or other physical features or the way they dress. But of late I have learnt of the more insidious foreigner roaming our streets and cluttering up the place with their presence and I am estimating they are half of the foreign types in our fair city.
These really are the sneaky foreigners. You are lulled into a false sense of security because they imitate the way we dress and act. They even look like us, but mark my words, they are foreign through and through. There is only one way to recognise them as foreign. They just can't disguise their voices. So you Canadians, you Americans, you Brits and Irish, I am on to you and you being here stealing our jobs and women and menfolk for relationships.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Happy and Gloria's. (is that neighbour Gloria Earl? What has Gloria Earl got to do with it?)
God save the Queen never made much sense to me until later in life when I understood the words properly. At primary school we sang it often. I don't know why. We just did it when we were told. Myself and my class mates intentionally or not, made it as flat and dirge like as possible. We went through motions with no understanding of who she really was or what we were singing.
We saluted the flag and we reverently put it up or down and folded it correctly.
At the end of a movie in a picture theatre, God save the Queen would be played. At the end of every public dance in a hall it would be played. It seemed every formal or semi formal social occasion would find us standing silently as it was played. It was played when television stations shut down for the night.
Her framed image was in every public building, often yellowed, fly dirt spotted, askewly hung, but there and omnipresent.
She is still on the reverse side of our coins.
I get involuntary muscle twitches in my legs when I hear God Save the Queen. My legs have received a signal from my brain, prepare to stand.
I think I heard ex PM Bob Hawke say how embarrassed he was when God Save the Queen was played at the Montreal Olympics when an Australian competitor won a medal. He was determined to change it.
And so now we have the not so brilliant Advance Australia Fair where we live girt by sea. I stand for that if everyone else does, but I am not programmed to do so automatically and I don't do it at home.
The Stanmore picture theatre used to be next door and the shop did a roaring trade with theatre patrons. Alas the theatre was demolished. I doubt the Olympia Milk Bar is profitable at all now, but it lives on.
OMG, there is even a Face Book group for it with 700 members.
Photos by Arthurly. While at times we lament the loss of our local milk bars, some have lived on well past their use date.
Most of the chocolate and lolly boxes are empty. Apparently the cigarettes he sells are years old.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Some are worried that the Chasers would be disrespectful, irreverent and god forbid, funny. Well, that is what they get paid to do. And what better to target than the pompous wedding of a non elected future ruler who is paid out of the public purse.
BBC, you are disgrace for kowtowing to the royals. How dare you threaten to pull the plug on the feed to our ABC if the Chaser broadcaster went ahead. Like the royals would stop the BBC broadcasting the wedding because of a tv show in the Colony of Australia that may have a 100,000 viewers, if that. You have made fools of us, wasted people's time and money and treated us with disrespect. Now you can just piss orf and take those English parasites with you.
R indicated that he wasn't interested in watching the wedding, so I will ensure we have sufficient recorded tv to cover the period.
The Age story here.
From The Guardian.
To Australia, that fabled young country, where a TV comedy troupe perceives itself to have been personally insulted by the Queen, Clarence House, and the BBC. The Chaser team are contracted to the ABC network, and had hoped to layer droll commentary on top of the live BBC coverage being provided to foreign rights holders. Alas, the fairly standard broadcast agreement forbids this – which senior executives have taken as some kind of international diplomatic insult.
"Clearly, the BBC and Clarence House have decided The Chaser aren't acceptable," fumes ABC director Kim Dalton, rather sweetly imagining that either of the above has the remotest idea who The Chaser are. As for the Aussie satirists themselves, they say: "The Chaser team accepts that the ABC has been put in an impossible position by people acting on behalf of the royal family."
Well quite – and it does seem wildly short sighted of the BBC, who seem to have forgotten that the boot will one day be on the other foot. After all, at some point in the future, tragic Steve Irwin's daughter Binky is going to get married, and the Beeb has just condemned British viewers to an unleavened four-hour state ceremony from the Crocosseum. Another spectacular cock-up by the cultural relativism department, all told, and we can only offer Australia our sincerest apologies.
Well Sister, you might not have noticed, but we always put the seat down and the lid. Perhaps you you could put the our lids down when you visit us?
Do as you find in other people's houses is not a bad thing to do. The exception is if they have the toilet paper hanging around the wrong way. This should always be corrected quick smart. The first person who comments that toilet paper can hang either way will get a slapping.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Posie Graeme-Evans is a screen writer.
Kelly Higgins-Devine is an ABC Brisbane broadcaster. I recall hearing her broadcast over summertime a few years ago. Happy to swap her for ABC Melbourne's female broadcaster.
Do they match their names? The first certainly does.
Ian recently posted this photo of the Art Deco interior of a 1938 Tube train carriage. Isn't it just a knockout.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
I booked in advance this time for ten people. I hate the responsibility of booking. The numbers dropped to eight. It ended up being for eleven people, so an extra chair had to be added.
R was abruptly spoken to by a waiter as he entered with six of us. Are you with them?, as he pointed to a group of people. Strike one. No, R was actually with the people he was arriving with.
Our dyke friend and her ex were with us. They have been to Almazett many times and eaten the Mezza menu. While we were happy with Mezza, they wanted to order separately. Not possible waiting staff told them if the rest of us were having Mezza. Why on earth could they not have been treated as a separate table? Next time I will book two tables, except there won't be a next time.
Our dyke friends not being able to order separately was what really got up my goat's nose.
Positive, the food was excellent as it always has been.
Come time to pay, four of us had discount cards. Sorry, not accepted today, Easter Monday. I had heard of this public holiday thing already so I checked in advance. I saw nothing about Easter Monday, which also coincided with Anzac Day but I lacked confidence to speak up.
Ex Northern Territory Politician/Policeman rang the restaurant once he was home and checked the vouchers book. Almazett was wrong. The discount cards should have been honoured. He drove back to the restaurant and collected the cash difference, $11 per person.
The last course is coffee you pour yourself from a pot. Dyke friend's ex asked for sugar but it was not forthcoming. Some scraping up of icing sugar from Turkish Delight almost made do.
Nah, over Almazett. I don't need such stress in my life. I am tolerant with restaurant problems, but there were just to many. While none of is would say it, it was a crap experience.
This week it featured water and naturally Australia was on the list. An Australian author has written a book about our water issues and so she was an obvious person to be interviewed on the programme.
If I could remember half the tosh she spoke, I would be doing well. But here is a bit of it.
Apparently we are/were limited to 140 litres per person, per day. Evidently if we use more, we receive a please explain letter. A sympathetic view is taken if you have new triplets. It seems we are not allowed to water our gardens, nor wash out cars with anything else but a bucket of water.
Now granted the woman was in Sydney, which she later mentioned, and perhaps the above are what Sydney's water restrictions were, but I don't think so, and she ought not speak for Australia with a voice from Sydney.
Occasionally a talkback caller will call in to ABC Melbourne and make a statement that it is taken on face value by the broadcaster who is in the chair at the time. I recall one about public transport tickets that I knew was very wrong. Even the esteemed broadcaster Jon Faine mentioned some nonsense about his public transport ticket problem being that he was too quick to get to the railway station from the tram, and it caused a ticket problem.
I like to hear corrections of such matters, or at least a caution issued by the broadcaster. Radio Netherlands really need to verify supposed facts before they go to air or at least be a bit more cautious about what goes out in their name. If only a little of the money that is going into the royal wedding could be snipped out for some cheap but quality radio, the world would be a better place.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
I suggested to The Beauty Hunter that Australians imagine the English in awe of their royalty. Anyone with a knowledge of the English will know that is not true. I'd reckon half of them think of The Firm to be parasites on society.
I said to R the other day, who hails from England, that we should watch the wedding. Why, he responded. Because it the last time we will see an impending monarch marry. When he was very young he has a vague memory of street parties for Liz's coronation but he can't remember her getting married. Charles' and Diana's wedding was memorable. It was future monarch marrying. I never thought about seeing another. But now that time has arrived, well, it is very unlikely that I and perhaps you will see another. I discount Charles' and Camilla's wedding. I don't want to be cruel, so let me just suggest that a soulmate does not have to be attractive.
As usual, I steal from others to construct a post. The Beauty Hunter provided me with this picture, a sick bag for the Royal Wedding.