Back in about 1985, R's late parents visited Australia. I was a bitch to them, although not outwardly. I refused to eat dinner at five o'clock, much preferring my normal seven o'clock eating time. I asked the MIL not to do my washing. Truth be told, I did not mind R's mother but his father was a lazy good for nothing whinging prick and R's mother waited on him hand and foot. They went home a bit earlier than they intended. (I am at the moment looking away into space like a guilty dog.)
Still, it wasn't all bad. We took them to the Moomba Parade. (Only Melburnians will really get that) Ah, we took them to see Ballarat, we stayed in a friend's caravan in Porepunka, we stayed on Phillip Island. We have some nice photos at Hedgley Dene Gardens in East Malvern. It wasn't all bad.
One night we took them to where a friend played piano at a pub in either Clifton Hill or Alphington. I can't quite recall. Our pianist friend played honky tonk style piano and was well known in gay circles, especially at Pokeys in St Kilda on a Sunday night. It was a great night but darkened on the way home by a sober driver, me, and a pissed partner and pissed in laws who discussed the reason for their son's suicide, R's brother. Tears were shed.
A friend of our pianist who we did not know was at the venue too. Quite kindly I describe her as short and dumpy. She seemed nice enough, if a little bit common.
'C'mon Doodee, do a number', the cry went out.
The sixty year old disappeared backstage and re-entered wearing different clothing and a bowl of fruit on her head.
It was one of the most wonderful live performances I have ever seen and can a short dumpy sixty year old swing her hips in time to a fairly high tempo number? She sure did. She sang, she minced, she swayed her hips, she pouted...she was better than any drag queen I have ever seen.
I would have liked to show you her performance as she did it better than the original, or even if I could show you another amateur doing it, but You Tube is not that good yet, or perhaps my searching skills are wanting.
Instead, there is only the original Carmen Miranda.