I have decided to come out as a gay man. There you have it. Are you shocked? I have seen five decades plus and this is the first time I have officially come out.
I have never really found the need to come out. If you read my brief profile blurb, it says I am gay. I expect saying it there has saved a lot botheration. That is pretty well the extent of me coming out. How can I come out when I have never been in?
As I age and the hormones don't race like they used to, and what a relief that is, this coming out business for gay men puzzles me. In gay media I constantly hear tales of teenagers stressing about coming out. I don't get the point of it.
At some point in my life, R appeared to my family. They accepted him. At some point the Bone Doctor appeared in Sister's life, and she too was accepted. (I recall writing to Mother saying that I hoped Bone Doctor would be accepted as R was. Mother never mentioned the letter or replied and she hasn't accepted Bone Doctor as well as she did R. Perhaps more about personalities).
I suppose most of my readers are of a certain age and have children or may, or have a while ago. Modern thinking is perhaps that you ask them? Once you know, you can smooth a path for them, make them comfortable in their sexuality, educate them about STDs, tell them that it does not matter. Hey son/daughter, you can even have children now.
Forget it. At the age of 16 and if you have brung them up right, they are close to being an adult. Just let them work things out for themselves. God forbid that they have to decide anything at that age. They don't have to come out and you don't have to second guess them.
Maybe it does not apply to all, but I expect many parents fear for their teenage children because they remember what they were like at that age. Of course it was different back then and there weren't the dangers that are around today. I can't agree. I think it was more dangerous back then.
All they need to know is that they have your love and support, wherever their path takes them. Society really needs to remove a lot of pressure from teenagers in many areas and recognise that teenagers are now much more worldly and educated in the ways of life. But they are still teenagers.
(this post could do with a good polish, but I am over it)