I hate dressing up like a pox doctor's clerk for funerals, but I do make an effort. I have never owned a suit, but I have 'good pants'. I take my pair of jeans along to change into later, along with my normal shoes. However, I have noticed some very downmarket dressing at funerals I have been to recently. What? You aren't on the funeral merry go round yet? Just wait. You will be.
Sis in Law's mother has five lovely daughters some of whom now have grandchildren. How many death notices were in the major daily newspaper? Three, one from our side of the family, one from Sis in Law and one from another daughter.
Mother placed ours. I did not like the wording, concluding with 'another link in the chain broken'. Is she having a go at the separation of our respective families due to the impending divorce of Sis in Law and Tradie Brother? R and I told her we did not like, but she went ahead. I gave her half the cost of the notice in cash and the call came, Andrew, here is the reference number. They won't let me pay later and I don't have a credit card. That is money I won't see again. (And proved to be true today)
Sis in Law left Tradie Brother's name out of the death notice, he who has done so much for her late mother and known her for 20 plus years, yet Sis in Law included her new fellah, who she has known for three months. Regardless of issues between Tradie Brother and Sis in Law, poor form.
I am not sure who is responsible, but Sis in Law's notice had her son's name, Dreaded Nephew, spelt wrongly and a misplaced comma made for four readings of the notice before it made sense. Nephew's name is not an unusual one, standard spelling.
I suppose I will keep my disapproval to within our side of the family about excluding Tradie Brother. Mother is ropeable about it but she is not saying anything to Sis in Law at a time of sadness for her either.
Then there are flowers! My modern interpretation is that if you can't attend a funeral that you ought to send flowers. Sis in Law's father's funeral, one wreath from our side of the family and one from his side. Step father, one wreath from us, and one from his brother. I recall attending funerals where there were racks of flowers.
The funeral is Saturday. What an extraordinary day to have a funeral! Seems Chainsaw Niece had a school trip to Tasmania and so the funeral was delayed.
Sister is not going. It is a long way for her to come and a long day to put Little Jo through. She celebrated Bone Doctor's father's 60th birthday by attending a family lunch on the Mornington Peninsula. As they weren't paying for lunch, they could justify bringing their car across on the Queenscliff to Sorrento ferry. They called in and saw Sis in Law, so she feels that is enough.
And written after the funeral. It was a shocker and not because it wasn't well conducted. Three speakers aside from the celebrant, Oldest niece and Dreaded Nephew, Sis in Law and Chainsaw Niece, and one of the departed's grandsons, 35 years old, and his father. Note there are six listed because no one could make it through without cracking up. No one could even get started for minutes. It was very raw emotion and even those who are not prone to tears at funerals gave up and shed tears. I cry at the drop of hat but I didn't expect I would much today but to see so many people in such a mess, I and everyone else couldn't help themselves. A perfect stranger would have been in tears.
Anyway, that is done and dusted. Mother, as the last one standing, was paid her due respect at the afternoon tea following.