Friday, July 24, 2009


While it is all very well young people driving around with 150 decibel music pouring from their cars and bass beats vibrating everything within fifty metres, including my teeth, it just so wrong for someone over thirty to play music so deafeningly loud.

I have mentioned a sad bloke at work with his personalised number plate before. He used his surname on his numberplate except clearly the name was not available so he used a 5 instead of an S. I don't think much of peronalised plates, but much less of the sad ones who can't get what they want and settle for something close.

This chap is over fifty and has now bought himself a monster shiny black 4WD. I have never seen a spick of dirt on it, so I can't imagine it is for offroad travel.

Anyway, he pulled into the carpark at work last week with the music absolutely pumping out of his monster beast. Truly deafening, except guess what the music was? (break para for dramatic effect)

No less than Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round an Old Oak Tree. What more is there to say.


  1. that reminds me of a quote from len deighton, the ipcress file i think it was...he's sitting in a red mg, dusty of course, wearing some sort of cap, smoking a gauloise and playing classical music very loud (this is the early sixties) and the girl says "i thought: how many ways can you be a snob simultaneously"

  2. Tony Orlando and Dawn are sooooo hard core!

  3. I'd snigger but I listen to Magic 1278 in the mornings! I don't drive a 4WD though...

  4. What a picture..."Tie a Yellow Ribbo..." he really is a wanker

  5. Hold up sweetheart, are you taking a shot at me with my loud music and personalised plates?

    I get the feeling you might be, only I play decent music and there's no numbers replacing letters in my plates!

    Oh, shit. I think you may have hit a nerve, but just so you know - I've put a lot of time and effort into cultivating my wankerisms.

  6. Traditionally the stereotype is that men with flashy cars, flashy personalised plates and loud music are compensating for small dicks.

    So I will take a guess that Tie A Yellow Ribbon Round The Old Oak Tree is his way of sending the phallic message that his...ahem...oak tree is pretty solid.

    Oh, wait a minute - I have a small dick and I don't do any of those things. Better rethink my theory.

  7. he was probably deaf, or well on his way to being deaf! If I had a car I'd play my music at a nice level... in fact my ex used to turn the music down at the lights coz he didn't want people to think he was an idiot! LOL!

  8. 'Tis rather show off Poet.

    At least I didn't know the singers Jayne.

    Better start searching for the UK equivalent Scott.

    Precisely MS, a wanker.

    Nope Mutant, you are young enough to get away with it.

    I would guess that he isn't Victor, purely because of the way his wife sleezes around other blokes. Not getting satisfied at home. And before anyone jumps on me, of course you don't need a big one to satisfy.

  9. Fenz, your ex probably turned the music down coz someone like me was glaring at him.