I am working evenings this week. I don't like it much, but I will say it is useful to have some decent daytime to get things done. Sometimes when I work evenings I buy food at work if Household Management has not cooked me anything to take, which he does at least half the time.
So night one, I bought Nandos chicken and chips. Night two, I had a nice curry to take, complete with vegetable garnish, rice of course and papadams. Tonight, night three it was take away hamburger and two potato cakes. Tomorrow night it is tuna mornay (I call it fish pie) with rice and vegetables from home. The last night will be a stir fry and rice from home. By the end of evening shift week, I am really hanging for lamb chops and vegetables on a china plate, or a nice steak and salad.
Tonight, as I usually do, I et one potato cake and then the hamburger and I normally eat the second potato after the hamburger. After the hamburger, I rose to wash my hands. As I was drying them I thought to myself, that was a funny thing to do before you have eaten the second potato cake, that is wash my hands. I go back to my table and where is my second potato cake?
I had screwed all the wrappings up, the potato cake with them and thrown the whole kit and caboodle in the rubbish bin. Damnation.
I sat there sipping my coffee and looking at the rubbish bin. My potato cake is in there. It is well wrapped up. Couldn't be any germs on it. It has only be a minute or so. Can't have picked up germs by osmosis yet. But the bin was deep and I did not note how full or empty it was. Five other people were sitting around. Now if the level of rubbish is high, I could just about retrieve it without anyone noticing.....maybe. But if it is down the bottom, I am going to risk upending myself, legs waving wildly in the air while I gasp in swine flu germs that surely must sit at the bottom of a bin. That may well attract attention.
By now, I was getting pangs of hunger that only that particular potato cake would sate. I stood, moved towards the bin. I felt five pairs of eyes on me. I retreated and sat back down.
Ok, there are some mental games needing to be happening here.
How much spud is in one cake? Not much. They are greasy, fattening and pretty bland really. Better I don't eat potato cakes. Yes, this is for my good health. I don't want the potato cake anymore. It is appalling food. It will go straight to my waist line.
In fact they should be banned. Outlawed. Disgusting. I shall never eat them again. Far to much energy input against energy output.
On to more important things. Will I eat the imported iced ginger biscuit or the locally made chocolate covered mint biscuit first? I will save one for later. Which will give me more pleasure later?
But gee I am sad. I really wish I could have eaten my very own one last potato cake. Ok, potato scallop for some of you.