Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Cut NSW Loose

A note to PM Rudd:

Heya Kevvie, not a great time to be PM. Budget surplus down and not as much to lavish around as perhaps you thought. Might I suggest something? It is all about politics and you are a political person. Here goes.

Of course you will save your largesse until nearer to your re-election? But us folk down Mexico way could do with a few dollars for some basic needs. Like you are the one who decides immigration levels, yet you don't give us dollars to cater for all the new people. Bit rough mate.

Ya know, we don't have a lot of spare water and our public transport system in Melbourne seems to be about to collapse under the weight of numbers. Educating foreigners is a great revenue stream, but we really need to have services and infrastructure in place.

And surely, you want to see Bumby re-elected. He is not such a bad bloke and more competent than many.

Can I just advise you this Kevvie, NSW is a basket case and there would be absolutely no point in giving them any of your largesse money, because your party will be trounced in the next NSW state election by Dr Who, Bob the Builder or whoever might be running. Who wins matters not, but it won't be Labor. So, no point giving NSW any largesse. Wasted money. No chance of re-election. So Kevvie, send the money down south to Mexico way.

Send a bit up north if you want and make sure that the Bligh woman is re-elected.

Forget about South America, south of Victoria, that funny little island. They don't matter and are quite used to bad and dangerous roads and no passenger trains.

Spend some money in NT for cane toad elimination, but since they have their shiny train to access the civilised world, they need no more. What? The train company has gone broke already?

South Australia, well no valid reason for it to exist. It is just the beginning of the Nullarbor Plain.

As for WA, look after the country so long as the mining royalties keep flowing but surely Perth is the responsibility of South Africa.

We Victorians subsidise other states, and that is ok so far as it goes normally, but methinks it is time to give us a bit back.

(Apologies to all interstate. Food parcels on their way to Sydney soon.)

14 comments:

  1. Anonymous1:56 pm

    May as well give it all to Vic, NSW has gone down the gurgler and is a waste of time trying to resusitate. May as well ship the harbour bridge and oprah house down there too.

    Nothing left up here to offer anyone - enjoy your depression everyone.

    ReplyDelete
  2. After reading Richard Flanagan's Out of Control I'd suggest Rudd take control of the Apple Isle as Fed territory.
    Yes, send moolah to Melbourne.
    Urgently.
    double checks spelling and grammar for Minister Holding's approval PFFT!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think the US troops should invade Western Australia, take their well-run public transport network and ship it down here (much in the same way the US takes oil from Iraq).

    The next strategy would be to dispatch $4billion for public transport projects in Victoria alone; scrap the inane baby bonus and raid the 'car industry resuscitation fund'. Economic euthanasia may be necessary for dying industries.

    ReplyDelete
  4. "...because your party will be trounced in the next NSW state election by Dr Who..."

    Actually I've heard that Rudd is the bookies favourite to take over from Tennant.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Brian...please stop your evil world order. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Me being a South Australian, I should probably be offended at your remark..........but I can't be bothered.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anon, your bridge and oprey house are revenue negative. Don't think you can pass your problems to us.

    Jayne, why is Holding so fussy about presentation. Is there a Mrs Holding?

    Economic euthanasia is an interesting concept Reuben.

    Brian, have you seen Rudd's face?

    River, visited Adelaide in 83 and had a great time. Stayed at Henley Beach. I am pushing the partner for a visit next year but not sure yet. It is on the agenda. So, yeah, I wouldn't be bothered about being offended.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'd better coin it quick fast before the IPA mafia catch a whiff of it.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Does sound a bit Thatcherite though.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Yeah...but seeing as Euthanasia was considered obscene in the eighties, I'm hardly surprised that she didn't get around to coining that term.

    Tell ya what...if the term does become legitimate, we'll split the wealth derived from it...seeing as I posted it it on your blog.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I assume by that 'Bligh' woman you mean Clover Moore. She was my member in Bligh until before the last state election when the seat was abolished. I lost her as my member as she moved on to the seat of Sydney and I acquired, to my dismay, the previous leader of the Opposition as my new member.

    Without moving an inch I now live in the ritzy electorate of Vaucluse.

    As for the NSW Labor government, what can I say?

    Help!!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Awfully like political suicide though Reuben.

    Victor, I meant Anna Bligh, Queensland Premier. (time to check facts) Correct. I am familiar with with the Bligh electorate and the changes. You are now in Vaucluse and will have a Tory rep.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anna Bligh. Of course, how dopey of me!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Yeah I know...probably the only reason why we keep economic dinosaurs like the Coal industry alive.

    ReplyDelete

Whenever I wish I was young again, I am sobered by memories of algebra.