Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Biff the missus

I heard an interesting discussion on the valveless wireless today. Please don't go to ABC Melbourne radio website. The site is so so bad, you will never find the details.

The discussion was about domestic violence in the Indian immigrant community and how both the male partner and the female partner have to change their attitudes to adjust to the Australian way of such things, along the lines of the man is not permitted to beat his wife, whether it is a punishment or just to keep her in line.

I quite like the idea of an occasional slap to keep the other half in line.

I wish I could remember name of the group that has been set up to support Indian immigrant women when occasions of domestic violence happen. But I dare not look at ABC Melbourne, as steam comes out of my ears when I try to find anything at their new beaut website.

There was even a magistrate on the program, giving her view and how the courts deal with the matter when it comes before them.

Although Keshi is not Indian, her antecedents are from the same area of the world, and she had a friend who was one of her country women and suffering domestic violence. I think it was sorted out, kind of.

Steph, the retired, who hates me, was also a sufferer, as she wrote in one very poignant post.

I had a couple of Indian workmates who were husband and wife. She was about 150 kg, and he about 60kg. I learnt that he committed violence on his wife when he was drunk on whiskey. It was hard for me to imagine how, when she could just sit on him and flatten him, but that is how it was. I learnt this years ago, but every time I speak to him or see him, I remember. J, you are nothing but a wife basher of someone who really struggles in this world. You have your solace in your whiskey, what does she have?

Believe it or not, I did have a boyfriend before R. The guy punched me on the nose one day after pursuing me through the streets of Ormond in his car. It was a half hearted punch and we were finished anyway, just petty jealously because I took his ex, that is R. It was nothing like living with the threat of domestic violence on a day to day basis.

Of course, none of my intelligent readers would indulge in such a thing, but if you know a victim or a perpetrator, there is help out there for all.

And, you have to think of the kids. I didn't like seeing my mother humiliatingly beaten bare assed after she had smashed all my father's bottles of beer. It is not something kids should see.


  1. I could never understand people who got violent when drinking whiskey. Getting violent when not drinking that's a different matter.

  2. me missus works at a service for split up families to see their kids under supervision.
    these are all serious cases where the family court is involved. most are to do with some form of violence

    surprisingly, lots of people that use the service are indian

  3. Friend of mine, in the midst of leaving her hubby and trying to find another home,just got a letter from that CES social payment place stating that domestic violence was no excuse for not demanding child support from the soon-to-be-ex.
    In black and white.
    I kid you not.

  4. So true Brian. Although I can get argumentative when I have a drink after a long week.

    Seemed to be what I picked up Kiki. Thanks for the extra info.

    Very insensitive to say the least Jayne. From what I hear of CES, they will see reason though when it gets to the right person.