Like some of our immigrants have taken the word wog as their own and blacks in the US have taken niggers for their own use between them, up to a point, most gay men don't have a huge problem with the word poofter.
But if any of the above are used as an abuse, of course there are problems and I cannot forget my childhood when poofter was only a derogatory term with a clear negative meaning.
Someone posted in a public internet forum the word poofter. He is a talented guy in his field and I religiously follow his artistic efforts. In a reference to his work, he mentioned wanky, arty, poofter in a self deprecating way. I am not sure if I over reacted, but I just did not like it and sent him a private message with my views. I was nice of course and my only really complaint was that it was public forum. I did get what he meant. He sent back a very nice apologetic and explanatory reply and he also has a good sense of humour.
As I said, I may have overreacted, but it is a dangerous and very loaded word to use around people my age. If you use it in your blog, I will judge it in its context. But don't let it run off your fingers, just think about it first. I have seen the word in some blogs I read but I can't say I have ever read it in a blog and being offended, but all my blog mates are such nice people.
Now this old pooftah queen needs his beauty sleep.