I don't know much about surfing, but Layne Beachley has got to worth a gong. What a long term stayer and what an achiever. Me 'at off to you cobberess. May your waves come often.
I don't know much about footyball, the Aussie version. No stand outs really. Not even a bothering of a team mate's wife by a fellow player this year, that we have heard about. Just some bad behaviour after clubbing. I give the award to Akermanis, the master of bluff. Brisbane's loss is Footscray's gain.
I don't know much about cricket but who could not know about Warne'ee? A brilliant bowler, it would seem. I think we would still know about him without the scandals. He must be a big boy down there and good at 'the romp' as well as being very sexually driven. Naughty, naughty Shane. Drinking, smoking, texting, root rat. Text me mate.
I really don't know anything about golf, a birdie from a wedgie, but a black US soldier poking a Thai lass while on r&r from the Vietnam war in Pattaya seems to have produced a golfer that everyone will remember. Go Tiger Woods.
I don't know much about swimming. Someone retired, but shallow shallow me, I have forgotten who. The water treading award goes to me, who managed to spend many hours in the pool this year without actually swimming a stroke.
I don't really know much about tennis. But this very common tennis playing bloke from Adelaide married an even more common lass and they live just down the road, devaluing highrise property as I type. They live in Y E, which used to be known as YVE, until someone knocked orf the V.
Bored by all this sporting chit chat now. It has exceeded my attention span. Lifetime achievement award to retired Aussie Rules footballer and now horse fancier and cyclist Peter 'Crackers' Keenan. He is a very witty bloke. He makes me laugh when I hear him talk and says things no one else would dare to.