Guest check list for Queen's birthday afternoon tea, fortunately not hosted by ourselves.
1 straight widow, 80
1 straight widow, 75 plus her toy boy, 70
1 gay male, 50, sometimes drag queen
1 gay male, 60 plus partner, 70
1 gay male, host, 65 plus Fijian partner, 34
2 gay brother, 56
1 gay male, 55, plus restaurant owner Malaysian born partner, 45, plus friend, Malaysian born, 35
1 bi New Zealand Indian, 40
1 gay soccer playing Fijian Indian, 43, plus Vietnamese born partner, 29, plus straight Aussie Indian, 30
1 gay Indian 35, plus Colombian partner, 30
1 lesbian, 45, plus partner 47
1 gay male, 67, plus partner, 50
1 gay Greek born, 43
Although there were a couple of no shows, we still managed to eat our way through scones, cakes, biscuits, buns and drank wine, tea and coffee.
If that wasn't enough, some of us stayed on for dinner, dahl, rice, spicy and plain chicken drumsticks, plus more cakes, tea and coffee.
Reading back, we all sound so old. In reality, there were only two people who could be called old in the behaviour. It was a great afternoon and sides ached from laughing so much.
If it wasn't for multicultural Australia, we would have all been old white men and probably grumpy too.
I am feeling very muliticultural at the moment while so many countries are connected by their interest in a black and white round ball. This game must be good for world relations.