At nephew's going away dinner, my seventy two year old mother had an audience. Old and young, and she had them in the palm of her hand with her tales of her own silliness.
She had a close friend who died some years ago at the early age of forty nine. When they were together, you could expect some outrageous behaviour from them. They used to egg each other on.
My sister reminded us of when they, Mum and my brother and sister and her friend and her three children went to the movies during school holidays. It is too long to tell fully, but the end result was my mother rolling down the movie theatre aisle clutching seven salad rolls and seven drinks just as the movie started. Movie theatres are her forte. Yes, another time she dropped the jaffas on a hard surfaced movie theatre floor and they rolled very well down the stairs.
Forgetting her age and general state of health, just two years ago she decided that she did not want to walk along the gently sloping paths at a park and that she should just walk down the steep grassed hill. She picked up some momentum and could not stop. At the bottom she realised that the hill dropped away sharply and had no alternative but to crash into a tree to stop herself. I have some vague recollection of her doing the same when I was kid, but it was sand dunes that time.
There was the time she fell into a prickly bush, also at the beach.
For Christmas one year, her daughter in law gave her a pair of ornamental swans. As she extracted them from the box, she snapped one at the neck. It wouldn't have so bad had she not laughed so much.
I am not sure if that was the same year that she accidently burnt a pair of light pyjamas that were a gift for someone in the incinerator, along with all the christmas wrapping paper.
She very carefully checks envelopes now when she gets a card, lest it contain money again, like the time she burnt an envelope after have taken out the card. The envelope still had twenty dollars in it.
When learning to drive, not that she ever did thankfully, she pulled the handbrake on so hard, she snapped the handle off it. Her expression as she held up the handle was priceless. (under the dash T bar handle)
Just recently at a rich relatives place, she was admiring the 'hand painted Royal Doulton with periwinkles' and turned the tea cup upside down to check it's origins. Pity that the milk was already in it.
Her latest was at my expense when she tried to blow out sparklers on her birthday cake and blew sparks all over the Brighton Antique dealers smart clothing. I haven't mentioned it to Brighton Antique Dealer, and nor has she to me.
Mother's are meant to embarrass their children, hey.