Tuesday, September 13, 2005


You in your modest house will only get one or two, but those of us who live in a large apartment complex get three. If you live somewhere like Eureka, you will get ten. Fairly irrelevant, until you receive the bill from the fire brigade. $1000 per truck for attending.

They had cause to attend our building on Sunday night. I missed the end of a tv show. It was so important that I can't even remember what I missed the end of.

I heard the sirens, then I heard them stop dead. Oh. Look over balcony and sure enough, there they are. The task now is to prevent the body corporate being charged, and hence all residents. Blame must be allocated.

I opened the door and I could hear the fire alarm ringing in a down direction. I walk down the stairs to the ninth level where it was loudest. The brigade is in someone's apartment and I can smell burning plastic. I catch the lift to the ground floor. No-one is there. Where are the committee members? The building manager? I step outside and stroll along a bit. Hmmm, that fireman looks ok. Pornographic 'man in uniform' setting kicks in. I stare up and the building and count floors. There are no lights on in any committe members apartments. I go to buzz the apartment of one member who's apartment I cannot see, then I spy the building manager in the foyer. A committee member arrives.

It was a faulty microwave in self destruct mode. No big deal, until the idiot dweller opened his door to the landing to clear the smoke and smell and so set off the the alarm. He is luckier than the chap who knocked off a sprinkler head with a surf board. There will be no charge as it was a faulty appliance.

In the documentation that every resident receives when they move into the building, is the warning about opening your apartment door to clear smoke. Pity some don't read it.


  1. I'm sure the bearded one will find some way to rant about this over the airwaves.

  2. Nine at night? Nah, too pissed by then to notice.